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Public Program. Brisbane (Australia), 17 April 1994.
I bow to all the seekers of truth.
At the very outset, I have to tell you that truth is what it is: you cannot change it, you cannot conceptualize it, you cannot know it unfortunately at this human awareness. A little bit more of our evolutionary process has to take place.
You have been alreayd told about the centres thatwe have within ourselves and how we get our self realisation. Regarding this I have to say that you should not believe me, whatever I have to say, blindfolded. We have had enough of problems with blindfolded faiths. But you must keep your mind open like a scientist, because whatever I say is proved, then you have to accept as honest people, because it is for the benevolence of your being, benevolence of your family, benevolence of your city, of your country and the whole world.
Today the problems you are facing, all kind of problems are due to the jeopardy of these centres. When these centres go into trouble, we have problems at human level. And the problems of the world are mostly because of human beings.
If, by some means, we know about this, we become aware of it. Knowing is not, just in a lecture, but to be aware of it. And if you know how to correct it, then you are all right physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually you are all right.
So the truth is that you are not this body, this mind, these emotions, intellect or your ego, your conditionings, but you are the pure spirit. This is the first truth about you.
Secondly we see here beautiful flowers all over and we take them for granted, we never even think that it is a miracle, the way these flowers are produced of different varieties by the Mother Earth; is very surprising, we never think about it..
Another thing is that we never ask the question who runs our heart and, if you ask doctors, they will say is the autonomous nervous system that does it. But who is this auto, we never ask this question. It is very surprising that we never ask questions about living processes, how it works out, how the living process works out.
And that is the essence of human life, life at large anywhere.
This happening has been described to you of this power within you; is very easy, sahaja. Saha means “born2, ja means “with”; I mean saha means “with”, ja means “born”, sahaj means “born with you” the right to be one with this all pervading power which does all teh living work.
So there is a subtle power whoch is extremely dynamic, which is described in every scripture, is described as the cool breeze of the Holy Ghost. It is described also the all pervading power of divine love, it is described as Rhu, it is described as Paramchaitanya. Patanlaji had described it as Ritambara Pragya.
All the scripture have described this power which is subtle, which we have never felt before.
So the second important truth is that there is a all pervading power of divine love, which we have no felt to far, to which we have to be united and this is what is Sahaja Yoga: is born with you is the right to be one with this “yoga”, the union with this divine power. Which does all widely work. It is the ocean of knowledge. Actually we know very little, as you know that our brain is limited. Is the ocean of compassion, ocean of blessings. But above all is the ocean of forgiveness.
So we torture ourselves sometimes feeling guilty, also sometimes by feeling the anger and not forgiving people. Wetorture ourselves. But as this is the ocean of forgiveness, we have to know whatever we might do can be forgiven, by this ocean can be dissolved.
I have to tell you that this is your own power, this is your own, innate, within you. It is there your own power and it is in this triangular bone which is called as sacrum. And surprisingly Greeks knew it was a sacred bone, they called it sacrum.
So this sacred bone contains in every human being this wonderful power, which is a reflection of a primordial power, that we call as the Primordial Mother.
As we turn to our science, what we find it cannot answer many questions. For example, science cannot say why we are here on this Earth, what is the purpose of our life and we are seeking our identity. The other day they told me that people tried to commit suicide to have in newspaper. All kinds of things are done for identity. They were all kinds of dresses, they were all kinds of funny [..], going about for identity. What is our identity is that we are the spirit and that is within us, every human being has that power. And once we achieve that state of spirit you understand things which you could never understand otherwise.
The first and foremost you understand that you become part and parcel of the divine power, that you have blessed by it, that starts running through you, you can feel it and you are empowered to do things which you could never do.
For example when it starts flowing in your fingertips, you can feel the different centres within you for self-knowledge and also the centres of others. So you develop a new dimension that we call as collective consciousness. That your awareness is very mundane and superficial, suddenly becomes collective and you start feeling on your fingertips the centres of others, thus you know what wrong these others is. Then you do not talk about the dress or the face, but you say that this kundalini, this gentleman has these centres which are out of gear and they are to be put right. And once you understand that, how to correct them then you can also correct others’ centres.
It is such a blessing for us that a human being who does not think much of himself, that is why he tries to find identity.
I always give an example, supposing you take a television set in a very remote corner of India where they have never see something like that; and tell them that this box can show you some films from abroad, they will say “This box?”
in the same way, we also think about ourselves, ourselves we think we are just ordinary boxes. We are not. We are very glorious, very powerful and we are the ones who can change all that is dangerous, destructive.
But for that, you have to develop correct vision and a proper understanding of what you are.
So when you become the spirit, the first thing that happens to you as I told you, that you become collectively consious.
The second thing that happens to you that your thoughts, which are all the time coming from the past and the future. if I tell you go to your present, you cannot. You cannot enter into your present. So these thoughts which are coming from the past and the future are all the time disturbing you and you are jumping on the cusp of these thoughts. But when this Kundalini rises, she elongates those thoughts. in between is the area which we call as the pause, vilamba, where your attention goes and you become silent. No thoughts, but you are fully aware.
So achieve a state that we call as thoughtless awareness, about which Jung has talked. Thoughtless awareness, where you are without any thought, in the present, that is reality. Present is the reality, not the future, not the past.
So you stand in that area, which is peace for us. So in that area which is peace within ourselves, when you arrive, you become absolutely peaceful. All this stress, strain of life finishes all and you become absolutely peaceful and this peace comes to you so beautifully, you drop so many years of your age. You become dynamic, you become compassionate, you work very hard, you travel, but it does not show, it does not work on you, it is just outside that you witness, see it as a witness. Like a drama, as you see, the witnessing of a drama of this world, nature, all kinds of things that you see is a drama.
Thus you become extremely peaceful. I know of people who have got rewards of peace, foundation of peace, all kinds of things, but they are horribly hot tempered, horribly. If you talk to them, you have to approach them with a [..] pole. Otherwise is very dangerous, extremely hot tempered people, you cannot talk to them. I do not know how they have become people who are supposed to have become symbol of peace, but those who do not have any peace within, cannot emit peace outside.
So this area, which I call as a area of peace, exists within you. Once it is estabilished, you will be amazed how many things can happen to you. Firstly what happens to you, you can sleep very well, you are always fresh and also your memory improves. That is the greatest thing that happens that your memory improves. Then your relationship with others also improves, your relationship woth others also improves because you are so peaceful. Another person who comes to you sees your peace and enjoys it.
Now it is very important to understand that we have that peace within ourselves and this state of nirvichar samadhi as they call that was very difficult once upon a time to achieve, people had to go to Hymalayas, stand on their heads, take up a guru and one person could get realisation. A guru will give only to one, I mean a real guru, because we hava lots of false people all arond these days martketing everything.
It cannot be marketed, one must understand. It is spiritual awakening which is spontaneous, it is a living process and you cannot pay for it. How much you pay the Mother Earth to create these flowers? So we cannot pay for it. Of course you can pay for the hall, that is different, but you cannot pay for your self realisation and for achievement in your spirituality. People have forgotten that they are spirit., they do not believe that they are spirit, they just think that they are this body and that this body has to vanish one day. That is not true. This body is guarded, is looked after, is nourished, witnessed by your spirit.
So once you get this realisation, you get your attention enlightened. Now Christ has said “Thou shall not have adulterous eyes”, i mean is a very subtle thing to say. In the Christian nations, how many people you can find who have such eyes? Very seldom. And really with this happening people develop those subtle innocent eyes which are very powerful: even aglance of such an eye can bring such peace [..]. Also it can cure people, it can help them. So what Christ has said, can be today brought in that our eyes can become innoncent. Such a troublesome thing eyes which are rolling all the time here and there, it really kills your attention, kills your attention.
By the time you are 50 years you are a gaga-person and if not at 60 you will be; because attention is going all the time from here to there to there to there, of no a way, it is just a mad race.
Now all our paradoxical culture that we see around, which is really tremendous, because I do not know how we can tolerate all this – everyday you read on the newpaper the husband kills the wife, wife kills the husband, children kill the parents, the parents kill the children… I mean, what is going on? It does not even happen among animals. Why should we become so violent? Why should we be so unnatural, devilish? Some of the things are really devilish. And persons who are good, who are righteous are shocked, by the things that are happening around; they cannot understand how these things are taking place and all the time they suffer from a sense of insicurity. All these things happen because of these chakras being out of gear. We will be amazed that they have gone so far, that – I do not know if you allow these things go on, there will be a complete, complete distruction.
It is said that, it is said that in 10 years 65% Americans will become schizofrenic, can you imagine?
This all comes from where? They said it comes from modern life, modern times, but who has brought the modern times? We have brought the modern times. It is our creation. We can say the media has done it… we can blame anyone we like, but the effect is that and a very dangerous effect of violence, of hatred, all kinds of horrible things are happening in this world.
Now what we have to see in this paradoxical culture is what is missing, is we do not have the idea of truth, they do not know – we have to know the absolute truth. If we all know the same truth, there will be no quarrel, no fighting, no arguement, no violence, nothing. But we do not know the absolute truth. Somebody says this is right, another says this is right, another says what is wrong? What is wrong if I kil my mother? What is wrong? How can he say what is wrong?
All sorts of absurd things really are justified by this brain, human brain at any level. So one has to think about it, why it happens.
Now when we look at anything, I am sitting before you if you can see I am sitting before you, there is no question, there is no arguement, there is no discussion about it. In the same way, if you can know the absolute truth, all of you the same thing there will not any problem either.
Now how will you know is on your fingertips, you see English language is very good for that, to say on your fingertips. There are five, six and seven sympathetic centres, five, six and seven sympathetic system. Right hand is for our physical and for our mental; I mean mental is a very [distant] word in English language. I should say for our intellect and whatever work we do through thinking and brain. And the left side is for emotions.
So we have wo sympathetic nervous systems in our body, which are shown here clearly and they are related to our right side and to our left side. This action through this sympathetic nervous system takes place only during emergency and we live with emergency, all the time in modern time we live with emergency, thus we develop all kind of diseases.
If we could some or other pacify our nerves and if we really could be in the centre, where we are neither in the future or in the past, we can really enjoy every moment of our life.
So the second thing that happens to you is that you know the absolute truth on your fingertips, means you know what centres you are catching. Somebody comes and tells me “Mother, my Agnya is catching”, is this one on the optic chiasma. now if you want to know what that means, that means “Mother I am suffering from ego” But nobody would say that. Unless and until you can see your ego, you will never say “I am suffering from ego”, a man who has ego… I mean, Hitler would say that? “I am suffering from ego” He would not.
So you have to see yourself very clearly and once you start seeing yourself very clearly you understand what is wrong with you and that state comes to you very easily and has an absolute truth. You make one person sit before ten children who are realised souls and tie their eyes and ask what is wrong with this person, they all will raise the same fingers, same fingers, that means they are all telling the same thing, the same truth, the absolute truth.
Sitting down here you can find out anyone you want to know, you want to find about anybody who is dead, you can know on your fingertips what is wrong with him. You know about yourself and you know about them. And if you know how to correct it, you have corrected youself and you have corrected them. It looks fantastic, it appears something out of the blue and for people is something they cannot understand, but you are that, you are that. As I told you that we always think we are just a box, it is not so. You have all these qualities within you, but too much of ego, too much of conditioning and also too much of mundane superficial life that really makes it very much low and you just see the superficial things. That is not so.
God almighty has created us to be very happy, very joyous people, to enter into His kingdom, not to make us miserable, not to make us unhappy, and to divide us into different levels of mental projection, no. It is actually in reality, we are all part and parcel of one divine love.
But that is only possible when you become the spirit, otherwise it is just a sermon or a lecture, by that you are not even connected to the all pervading power and you cannot find out what is wrong with you, what is wrong with others and what is wrong with the whole world. For that knowledge to be innate within you, whatever knowledge we have is only bookish knowledge and we really get involved into the web of words, words words words words. They go on reading books after books and you do not know what to do with them, they cannot see between the lines what is written; and they do not want to know, because they are quite satisfied with what they are reading, according to them is the best [..]. But are you peaceful? Are you all right? Are you above illnesses? Are you full of compassion? Are you relaxed? No. There is somthing missing, why should not we have that? And that is because we have to seek and we seek the truth.
But once we seek the truth, we find it, it is necessary first to find the truth and then to talk about it.
Before that it is just a mental projection and has no meaning, just a mental feed going on. I have seen people sitting down, round the table, thousands of them had such kinds of experiences and discussing this and that and finding nothing. So something has to happen within us and the happening is the awakening of this Kundalini, this force. She has to ascend to these six centers and pierce through fontanel bone area and to be connected to this subtle force; as this instrument [the microphone] has to be connected to the mains otherwise it has no meaning, in the same way we have no meaning unless and until we are connected to that force.
And this is what we have to do, it is something so simple. It has to be, because it is so vital. Supposing for our breathing we had to go to libraries to read about breathing, what would have happened to us? Today is so vital that we should have this happening within us and that we should know ourselves, by which we should know the whole world.
By knowledge I do not mean the knowledge through books, but I am meaning the knowledge on our central nervous system. For that, in Sanskrit there are two words. One is Buddha, boddh, from where the buddha has come; bodh is to know everything on your central nervous system. And the second word is vydh from which Veda has come, and the first words of Veda is that “by reading this book, if you do not get your self realization, it is useless to read Vedas”. All essence of Vedas is put there.
So what we have to do is now, just to know that we have this power, it is within us and is all going to work out. A part from that, what happens you enter into a mere miraculous world of blessings, such blessings that you cannot explain. People write to me, “Mother this happened, that happened such a miracle how I got rid of this problem or that problem”. So I told somebody, “Why don’t you try to record them?”
In within one month, he said they have come up to my head now, I do not know which one, do you want to please, Mother, read it and tell me what to do. I said, “Baba, I have no time, travelling travelling, I have no time, will you please give up the idea of writing those miracles?”
So that is what happen and you jump into the ocean of joy. Joy is not happiness and unhappiness. You see when we have ego, it is pampered, we feel very happy; when it feels punched we feel unhappy. But this is joy, that you are eternally in a state of enjoyment and everybody can find out. Then you realize what is wrong and what is right, you develop a divine discretion and you just drop out whatever is destructive.
You will be amazed we are fighting drugs at this level, that level. Nothing to be done, you just get you realization. In England will be surprised, so many of them, just after realization, over the night they forgot about drugs, forgot completely, give it up. Alcoholism, this that, all these things they dropped without even thinking about that. I did not tell them, I never tell “don’t, don’t”, I never tell them Ten Commandments, because if you tell in these modern times nobody will seat here.
But once they see for themselves what is wrong, they just stop it. In the seeing is the being, you become. I give an example of the snake in the hand, when is darkness, you cannot see it; the person [..] will say “Oh, it is not a snake , is just a rope I am holding on to”. Till the snake bites, it will go on like that.
But if there is a little light, then you see the snake and you just drop it out by yourself, nobody has to tell you. You become your own guide, your own master and drop it. You do not need anybody to tell you, you just drop it yourself.
thus your life is on the proper lines and you move on the proper lines. We have to be sensitive about it, this is the main point I find, because of this paradoxical culture again I say people are very insensitive. We think people are very advanced, but they do not know. All this advancement, all this pomp and show of cultures has no roots , is a [rotting]. We have the knowledge of science, this that, but we have not got the knowledge of the roots and this is the knowledge of the roots that we have to have if we have to save ourselves.
As you know very well that Sahaja Yoga is working in 62 nations, especially in Russia and Eastern blocs. Of course in India it is because they know about it, but Russia and Eastern bloc people I was surprised, because they are no so materialistic. They are not so much worried about material things, they are, 70% of them are very spiritual, it is very surprising. They are very introspective and they threw away all the false gurus who prospered everywhere in the west; they gave them away, they threw them out. No one of them could be successful. I was surprised how they were sensitive to Sahaja Yoga, which I know is the real thing.
And all this falsehood has taken people away. Like this time I went to America, they were complaining about one Mr. Pradip, something [..] that he had taken so much money from them, the children had gone out of the houses, we now do not know what to do. First, when I went there, they were telling me about TM, this and that, all these gurus, Rajanish this that; but I said, “why did you go to him?” I cannot understand. “Because, you see, he was claiming this…”
I said “Whatever one may claim, first of all you must see the disciples, how they are, how they are behaving, what sort of a life they live. Are they righteous people? Or they are the gangsters, and you think the guru is great because they have become gangsters?”
So many people have lost their houses, have lost their children, I mean horrible things have happened with false gurus and I am sorry to say this has come from my country, India.
Not all, but so many of them are still going on everywhere. And the other day I met some of the “born again”, horrible looking people, shouting, screaming, I do not know, and all wrinkled. So I said (young people) “So are you born again?”, they said yes, I said I do not think, you are not. See your faces look like hoax, how can you be born again? Your faces show that you are not born again, is just a label you have got as you have got a label that I am a Christian, I am a Hindu, I am a Muslim. This is the worst, because you have taken a certificate saying as you are born again, but if you are born again then you have powers. You behave like hooligans here, how can you call yourself born again with such hoax like faces that you have? There not peace, there is nothing, nothing of Christ in you, you are not connected to Christ, you are not connected to God, you have to be connected to Him, otherwise you will not know what you are doing.
Everybody thinks if they go to church – I was also born in a Christian family and I was surprised how they believe that they are Christians. You have to be connected and He has said it, he has said it many a times that you are to be born again. So you get this kind of “born again” all around the places doing nothing and just making lots of money – I do not know what they are doing. It has to be genuine.
If it is genuine, it should show results, it should show results in the disciples , how they are, how they behave. Are they humble people? Are the righteous people? Are they people with character? Do they respect their chastity, which Christ has very clearly said? But that is not so. We have seen all smugglers in India are disciples of all these gurus, How can you be smugglers if you belong to some spiritual movement. Spirit makes you clean, washes all your sins, it washes off all your – I should say – the evil ideas that you have and you become a beautiful person, because you are beautiful. It is like the sun covered with the clouds: once the clouds are removed then you are shining like a sun. And this should happen tonight and I hope it will happen to all of you.
Today is my last day in Australia, I am going away. Every year I come here. We have very good, strong sahaja yogis, even in Brisbane we have, very good people. They are not showing, they are not wearing funny dresses, nothing of the kind, they are just like normal people. And they are intelligent, they can talk to you about Sahaja Yoga, they tell you about it, without any ego, without any aggression. If you want you can have it, so your freedom is respected. If you want to go to hell, all right; if you want to go to heaven, all right.
It is your want, it is your desire, because this power is the power of pure desire. If you have the oure desire to ascend, then only it will work; all other desires are not pure. You want to have, say for example you want to have a house, you will have a house; you want to have a car, then an airplane, I do not know what else. But nothing satisfies, because all these desires are not pure. Whether you are aware or not, you are having the desire to be one with this all-pervading power which is the pure desire and I am sure it will work out tonight with the people, as I see you here so anxious to get your self-realization. I know you all are very anxious as well as there are some who have questions and they would like to ask questions.
Now, what I would like to tell you that I have been doing this for the last 25 years. You know my age is now 71, might be 26 years, I should say. And what I find that I know all kind of answers to all kind of stupid questions. I have mastered it now. But what just a mental things, why wasting energy on that, you see? You should better get realization first, and after ask me questions, I do not mind. First thing is to get to the light, to know yourself, this is the thing for which you are here. You are not here for some sort of a party or something, but to get to know yourself, which is so important from every angle.
I would like to tell you, there are four doctors in Delhi who have got their MD with Sahaja Yoga. Different diseases they took one each and they have shown that Sahaja Yoga cures people. It does, it has cured so many people, it has helped many people who have been going astray, who have been doing wrong things in their life, it has brought them to right path. And if you want to save your life, you have to think about it seriously what have you been doing so far, see if has not helped you, has not answered anything.
So, those who want Sahaja Yoga, those who want to become self-realized are requested to stay in the hall, but those who do not want I cannot force. So if you do not want, it will not work and it is just a waste of time and energy. So I would request you to leave the hall so that others do not get disturbed by you. If you want to have your self-realization then you are welcome, very much welcome to stay here.
It will hardly take ten minutes and you are all capable of getting it. But of course you cannot give realization to a mad man or to an idiot, you know? There are many mad people nowadays going around. But of course for anybody who is a normal person, you can get it.
There are three conditions. The first condition is that you do not to have feel guilty about anything, at this moment. It is a fashion to feel guilty, is really a fashion. What so feeling guilty, people feel guilty because they spill their coffee or something like that. Just torturing yourself for nothing at all. So you have to respect. I would say, you have to be pleasantly placed towards yourself. As in Sanskrit we call prasanna chit.
Know that you are a human being, you are at epitome of evolution and why should we all the time, because we have freedom to do whatever we like to ourselves, go and feeling guilty for this and feeling guilty for that? It is a myth.
Second myth we carry is, if I say that you have to forgive everyone they say it is very difficult. Now logically, just think about it, whether you forgive or do not forgive, you do not do anything. What do you do? Nothing! But if you do not forgive, then mentally you play into wrong hands, you torture yourself.
In the first case, when you feel guilty this center goes out of order, this one here on the left and you develop diseases like angina, spondylitis, lethargic [..]. With the second one, when you do not forgive, this center on the optic chiasm, in the brain is like this [Shri Mataji crosses her fingers], absolutely like this, absolutely constricted, but when you forgive it opens out. Because it is another myth with which you are torturing yourself; as it is you are tortured yourself, for others who have troubled you are very happy people, but you are troubling yourself by not forgiving. And by not forgiving you will not allow this center to open and Kundalini will not pass through, so you will miss such a great chance of becoming the Self.
So just do not think it is difficult, it is the easiest thing at the moment to say that I forgive everyone, now do not think about them, because even to think about them it is headache. So best, in general, to say I forgive everyone, you will feel much lighter, I tell you.
Now the third one is even easier, because I assure you I verily say that you all should have self-confidence, full self confidence that you will get your realization tonight, today now. Please have that self-confidence, it is very important. Now do not think that I have committed that sin, that thing, all these ideas have come to you from human beings, not from divine, why believe them?
I have committed this sin, that sin and those and I am such a great sinner and go and confess the sins. All nonsense. You are a human being, respected by the divine and you have to enter the Kingdom of God; so please understand, do not try to condemn yourself, but be full confident.
These three conditions are there which are very (I think), are simple, logical and very much needed for your realization and if you value yourself then please do that. You have no business to de-value yourself. Let the divine decide, let the Kundalini decide, why are you bothered? If this is the last judgment, let the Kundalini decide.
I think this is the blossom time, where I have seen thousands and thousands blossoming and then becoming the fruit, I have seen. So that is how what I have to assure you to all get your self-realization, only have your self-confidence.
Last of all we have to know that it is not an individual thing. Now you will feel very much better after realization, I know, you will feel very happy, on top of the world, but this connection has to be fixed, for that I would request you that you should come to our collective. Now it is not like lecture, introductive lecture, free and then you charge money… it is not like that: you will not be charged any money. For all this knowledge you will not be charged. Please come to the collective and then grow into it and then master the whole art within one month time, maximum. You can become your own master, you can master the art of Sahaja Yoga by which you can give realization to others and achieve that last state which we call as Nirvikalpa Samadhi, where there is no doubts about your Self; and you know all these powers and you know how to raise them and you know how to give realizations to others, like when one enlightened light (when enlightened) can enlighten other lights. In the same way you can go on giving realization to others and enjoy this great gift you have got. It is all there, just to get it, but you have to come to the collective in a humble way, because we do not have big palaces for meditation, no we have simple places; and then you will be surprised how to be in meditation, not to do meditation. But we have to be in meditation, where you are silent, you are in the present.
In this small lecture, whatever possible I have tried to tell you, but is full of knowledge, I think there must be four thousand tapes of my lectures in English language, a part from other languages. So you all can make avail of it and enjoy it. It is all available to you. Look at these children, you know to an Englishman to teach one word of Hindi was headache, they could not tell them, they could not pronounce them properly. But look at them, they are singing Sanskrit songs, Marathi songs, Hindi songs, with all the tunes and everything and everything, rhythm, you will not believe that if the Indians hear they would be surprised, in India happened and they were so shocked.
So many artists said, “Mother we must touch their feet”, I said why? “In such a short time they have learned”. It is the power of Spirit. You become so dynamic, so creative, so wonderful, there are so many things that happen.
I would say it is a temptation of the mother, like in England no sahaja yogi is unemployed, [there are millions that are unemployed], not one. Everybody has gained because your attention becomes all right, you become so dynamic. You see with this attention which is so enlightened you can decide, you know everything and you can manage things. So every way you are helped, every way.
So now, again, I was saying that sometimes it is, people do not like when I tell them that they have to take out their shoes, it is not too much to take out the shoes please, because this Mother Earth helps us a lot, if you do not mind.
I have to make a request that for about ten minutes, until we have this procedure. I am going to tell you how to make your chakras activated [..]. During that time, please, nobody should leave the hall disturbing others. If you want to leave, you should leave now.
H.H. Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi