How to go beyond the ego and know yourself, Meditation

London (England)



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How to go beyond the ego and know yourself, Meditation

Advice at Dollis Hill ashram, London (UK), 18 November 1979.

But sahaja yoga is that triggering great happening by which the creation of God is going to get its fulfilment and is going to know its meaning – it is that great! Perhaps we do not realise it, but when we say, “We are sahaja yogis,” you have to know that, to be a sahaja yogi, how much identified you should be with the Truth of Sahaja Yoga, and so many misidentifications which are hanging on to you must be got rid of.

People call it a sacrifice. I do not think it is a sacrifice. If you think something is hampering your way you try to take out that hurdle. In the same way, if you stand out from your obstructions, you will be able to understand that these obstructions are standing in your way and they are not your own and that they are stopping your progress. So you should get this misidentification out of your minds completely and try to be more and more your Self and not a misidentification. This is one the problems, I think, people have here. Whenever I get any complaints or anything, I understand that still the level of understanding about Sahaja Yoga is not up to that point. It is a tremendous task! And for that, if you are the people who have to come up and if you are the people who have to fight it, you have to understand it in its full extent and also understand where you stand for it: how much you have to do? how much you have to improve yourself? Because you are the people who are going to take the Sahaja Yoga to that position where it has to reach because as far as I am concerned, I have nothing to do anymore. I have done it. Now it is for you to receive, you have to imbibe into it and you have to change the whole thing; that is your job and that is why it is a serious matter.

The second point I always have been saying [is] that, due to ego problem, we are very much disintegrated. We are so disintegrated that the connection with the Divine is never properly established. As I have said it, that this instrument (microphone) if it is divided into five parts and all the five parts are fighting with each other, you cannot get anything done through this instrument, through it is connected to the mains. In the same way if you still remain disintegrated you cannot get that connection. For example, people come down here, I have seen, for Sahaja Yoga; now they have other interests and there’s other priorities and other things are there which are very important for them. All the time, they are wasting their time for that, and then they will say that, “Mother, we are not progressing much in Sahaja Yoga.” If you decide, as he (Mr. Venugopalan) has told you that, “We have to do Sahaja Yoga first and the other things are secondary,” then only the Sahaja Yoga can be really established into you.

We’ll have some Sahaja Yogis of a very high level, I know that, and we will have some of very mediocre level, some will be absolutely useless and some would be absolutely thrown away. We’ll have all types. That also I know. Now it is for you to decide: where do you come? How far you are going to? If you are going to waste your time in thinking about other sahaja yogis and small, small things and trivial things as he has said it, your disintegration is going to be increased, you are going to [be] separated much more because all this decision is taken through your ego: “I don’t like it, I don’t do it, I don’t see it.” If you could somehow or other see your ego working, then you can get rid of it. And that is the thing one has to do; not to fight the ego. I never say, “Fight the ego!” But surrendering is the only way your ego can go. And that’s why the progress in the West, as you have seen it, is much less than it is in India. Now, take his case, I would say, particular case of [Mr.] Venugopalan: he’s really remarkable because he is a man who is holding a very big position in India. Here I see, even if a person is a dishwasher [and] he comes to Sahaja Yoga, still his ego is so big [that] even our Prime Minister won’t have such a big ego as he has! I mean, the way he will talk that, “I don’t like it, I do this, this!” I am myself amazed the way people [talk]! You see, everybody has become the King of England or what? The way they talk! This is something one should tell people when they come here, that, “Don’t waste Mataji’s energies in arguing and this and that,” because everybody thinks no end of themselves here, and that is the biggest hurdle that they have, when they even come first time, you find it so difficult! I have to show all my appreciation of their ego, all the time, just to satisfy them so that they come round. And this is how the progress becomes less.

Now, in his case, (Venugopalan) he is a person who has been to all kinds of horrible ‘gurus’ and his wife has been also to all kinds of horrible ‘gurus’ because of another extreme in India we have, that we must respect all the saints. But these days the saints are fake saints, not only fake saints, but some of them are devils! So they are not going to say, “We are devils.” When they do not say they are devils or whatever it is, they do not come in their proper form, these simple, innocent people, who are seeking God, just go to them, give their heart, do everything and then they find that they are devils. Once they discover they are devils, then they are surprised. Then they come back from there, they go to another guru, they go to another guru, but the harm is done. But they get rid of that harm because they recognise that harm has been done and they know, what is the Truth is, what is to expect. I would say it is the blessing of that country that people know what to expect. People would not like to go, those who are really of a very good quality people, will not go to a man who shows some sort of a a sensationalisation or some sort of a chamatkar (चमत्कार) – is a miracle – they would not go, but they will go to other subtler people, who are very cunning and they put up another kind of a show and just say that, “No, no, this is the way you can achieve the highest,” and that’s how most of the sahaja yogis in India also have been – except for the village people and the district people – most of the city people have been to some guru or someone. But despite all that, they have left everything. I have told them, “You have to beat them with shoes.” They’ll do everything morning till…every day he does his sadhana (साधना) for one hour though he’s a very busy man. Here even to get up in the morning, people grudge. I mean, what can you do with such slow moving people? You see, it is absolutely very difficult!

And this is what I feel that we must understand that we have a very great responsibility, very great responsibility in the West, because this has to happen in London, it has to happen in England to begin with, and that’s why you bear a very big responsibility. You have to evaluate yourself and you have to evaluate Sahaja Yoga, again and again and again. And know that what makes you slow is your ego – or even superego is there, no doubt – but ego is the main problem. I must tell you [that] ego is the main problem but I dare not say to anyone that, “This is your ego,” because that will just jump on to my head. But try to see your ego, how it is deviating, because it is your own joy you are seeking, it is your own property you are seeking, it is your own that is hidden from you, for which you have been seeking for ages now; that is what I have to expose for you. What is there to argue with a person, who is trying to give you the highest? It’s just a waste of energy. Do not waste your energy onto these things, onto frivolous things, about finding faults.

Now he has been organising our Delhi Camp, he is the one who has organised our printing of the book and all. I have not known any problems there. You just tell them that, “This has to happen,” “Alright!” I do not know how it works out. You have stayed in Delhi. You have seen how many people were there. Never a problem! Did you hear anybody complaining? Or anybody quarrelling or fighting among themselves? Nothing of the kind! You see, this is not the sign of intelligence either; of all the time trying to find faults with each other or trying to blame yourself. Both things are wrong. Best thing is to grow in wisdom, we must grow in wisdom. We’ll, ourselves, see that we are becoming wiser and wiser.

Some of you are really very grown up and some of you still go up and down, and some of you’re still very low. So all of us have to get up and all of us have to go together. If somebody has also achieved something it is of no use to Sahaja Yoga, as I have told you, it’s a collective thing that is going to work out. All of you have to work it out and it is so sweet that you have real brothers and sisters all over the world today. When you’ll go there with the full heart they are going to receive [you] as you have received him with full heart. But we all must come up! Come up to a point, where we can face each other with full love, with openness, without any worry about anything, without any fear of anyone; but just [that] they are your brothers and you are their brothers and that you have to love them.

That’s only possible when we’ll get out of our fears here. Because there is also another side to it that ego always has a fear; because it aggresses others it is afraid also because it knows others can aggress.

So this is a point we have got to think about. But that never means that in any way despise yourself, never! You are saints, you must know that. You are realised souls! How many there are realised souls in this world? How many there are who can raise the Kundalini? How many there are who understand what is vibrations?

I’m going to tell you, on Guru puja, what things you have achieved, and how many things you have got within you, built-in now, which are working, and how your chakras are awakened through Sahaja Yoga. As he says, “Yes, it has happened.” But what are we doing about it? It’s is the greatest of the greatest that can happen to anyone; that you know. Also you know this is the greatest happening which was prophesised long time back as the Last Judgement. You know that this is the way you are going to be judged, so we have to work very hard, we have to work. It is effortlessly given to you, alright, but to maintain it, to keep it up to go higher, we have to religiously work it out with a very humble attitude – receiving more and more and more, imbibing it into your being. Let it trickle into your being, completely covering it. Let that joy, that Eternal Bliss come into you. I am so anxious for that. Do not make yourself a small person. Have a bigger vision, have bigger ideas because now you belong to the Bigger Thing, the biggest of all, the Primordial, the Highest, to the Viraat! If you realise your importance then you will work it out.

You see, if you see an Indian Sahaja Yogi, you will be amazed! He sleeps only for two, three hours or four hours, but he will not give up his sadhana. If he can get his full sleep it’s alright. First thing he sees is, “One hour for sadhana in the morning. I have to get it out somehow.” But sleep? We have been sleeping all our lives! We have to correct ourselves, we have to rise, we have to go ahead – to achieve your own. That’s the main point is! See your own selfishness, I am telling! To know yourself is the greatest selfishness. If you do not know yourself, all the selfishness is useless. As you call a swartha (स्वार्थ), in Sanskrit it is said ‘swartha’, Swartha means ‘selfishness’. If you break it ‘swa’ ‘artha’ – if you know the meaning of your ‘swa’, means your ‘self’, then it is the greatest selfishness.

So this is what it is and we are very happy that he’s here. We’ll be going to India also, next year we also are planning to go to India and you are going to meet [them]. Lots of them may come to Delhi and Bombay. They are all waiting for you, they are all planning how to receive you, they are so happy that so many of Sahaja Yogis from London and all over will be coming. And you know how they look after you and how they are happy and how they are joyous.

And certain things definitely have gone wrong with us, we know that. We should understand them because these are the troubles of our over-thinking and over-reading and over-domination but we can get rid of it very easily. It is just to detach yourself and see for yourself addressing yourself, “Now Mr. how are you?” If you say like that, immediately your attention will go, through yourself you will see your outer being. That is very important. The more you see yourself clearly, the better it is. You have to face yourself. And you do not want to face, you are afraid of facing yourself, because you have been aggressing others and you are afraid to aggress, in a way that is towards yourself. But there won’t be any aggression because that’s the perfect state where you see yourself and neither you aggress anyone nor you are aggressed by anyone, you just see yourself clearly. And that is what you have to see.

Gradually you start seeing your chakras, seeing your problems, your thing and you know that how, gradually, it develops. But everybody wants a quick results. It’s alright, if you want quick results, alright, are you like that? If you are like that you will get a quick results; if you are not, then be patient with yourself, not with me, but with yourself, I am saying, you have to be patient, because there is a problem with you so you have to be patient with yourself and not with anybody else – that’s is the main point. If you are patient with yourself, this is a long promised thing which you are going to get. But you must learn to be patient with yourself and not to be angry with yourself, not to debase yourself or not to aggress yourself on to others. It’s a very simple thing, it’s the simplest thing to do, but because of our complex life and our complicated thinking we have become quite twined up into things. It can easily be got out of, you can just slip out of it without any difficulty. I know that you can do it so forget about all these things like, “My father, my sister, my brother.” All these problems will be burnt in no time as soon as your life runs straight. Everything will burn away, nothing will be left but your light and others who will come to you for enlightenment.

I know that you are going to have a big day for a Guru puja. Before that I would request you to prepare yourself. I may do something great but I must have a proper recipient so [for] that you must prepare yourself. Think about it – are you loving others? Are you in love? Are you in love with everyone? Just to think that you love everyone is so great! I mean you ask me. Everybody says, “Mother, you look so young! How do you look?” It’s because I always think of how much I have to love. You see, so much love I have to give to others. Just think how great it is to love others. You know how people treat me sometimes, doesn’t matter, I’ll still love. I enjoy playing with it. In the same way you should love, and love is the thing that is going to unfold beautifully like a lotus opens out it’s petals and the beautiful fragrance starts flowing. In the same way, your heart will open out and the fragrance of love will spread throughout the world, it will ring into people. I know it can happen, the sooner the better and the choice is your own which you have to make a choice.

So I’m very happy because such a beautiful song to hear and just before Christmas which is a very big thing for me, you know that. And in the same way we are having another Christmas now, Christmas to celebrate a new Christ, born within us. Let us prepare for His coming and how you prepare is not by running away from yourself, not by getting into frivolous things but by working it out, beautifully. Cleansing, cleansing has to be done if the Self has to be established in the temple of this being.

May God bless you all.

(Guided Meditation follows )

Now first before meditating, in your heart, or, you should see in your heart, and there try to put your Guru in the core of it. After establishing in the heart, you must bow to that with full devotion and dedication.

Now, whatever you do with your mind, after Realisation, is not imagination because now your mind, your imagination, is itself enlightened.

So project yourself in such a way that you humble down at the feet of your Guru and now ask for the necessary temperament needed for meditation, or atmosphere needed for meditation.

Meditation is when you are one with the Divine.

Now if there are thoughts coming in, first you have to say the first mantra, of course, and then watch inside. Also you must say mantra of Ganesha, will help some people. And then you should watch inside and see for yourself which is the biggest hurdle.

First the thought. Now, for the thought, you have to say the mantra of Nirvichara, that, “Twameva sakshat Nirvichar sakshat Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi namoh namaha”

Should say it thrice.

(Yogis repeat a slightly different version of the mantra that Mother has suggested, three times.)

Now we come to the hurdle of your ego because, you see, the thought has stopped now, no doubt, but there’s still a pressure on the head. So, if it is ego, you have to say, “Twameva sakshat Mahatahamkaara…” – Mahat means ‘the great’, ahamkara means ‘the ego’  – “…sakshat Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi namoh namaha.” Say it thrice.

(Yogis again repeat a slightly different version of the mantra that Mother has suggested, three times.)

Now, even now, if you find that ego is still there, then you have to raise your left side to push it back to the right hand side, with your hand; one hand towards the photograph.

Push the left side higher and right side lower so the ego and super-ego get the balance. Do it seven times. Try to feel it, how you are feeling inside, you see.

Now you raise your Kundalini up on the head and tie it up.

Again raise your Kundalini up on the head and tie it up.

Again raise your Kundalini and tie it up.

Now at the Sahastrara you should say the mantra of Sahastrara, thrice.

(yogis repeat Shri Kalki sakshat, Shri Sahastrara Swamini, Moksha Pradayini Mataji, Shri Nirmala Devi namoh namaha three times)

Now it’s opened out if you see. Now you can open again your Sahastrara like this. Just take it down again and see that you are stationed there. Once this has been done then you go into meditation. This is like cleansing, you see, called as nyasa.

Now, if you find any other obstruction, you can also say, like, if you have got, say, Mahakali’s problem, you can say that mantra, clear it and then you sit down for meditation. Any individual thing, you can take it out, like, if you have the ego problem, if you think, then you should start with Mahatahamkara. It is what you have to find out: What is your problem? Where is the Kundalini stopping? You can feel it within yourself.

Some of you may not feel. If you do not feel it, feel it on your fingers. If you are not feeling within yourself then feel it on your fingers, you can feel it.

Ah, Better.

Reduce your breathing, will be better. Reduce your breathing as if stopping, but no exertion about it.

How is it now? Better? Where is the problem? Hmm?

Yogi: Central heart

Shri Mataji: Central heart? Alright, hold your breath. Not with great force, just ordinarily. Alright?

Sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba.

Alright? Leave it. Better now? Once again? Alright, hold your breath.

Sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba. Haa.

Leave it. Better. Keep your eyes open. Again. Hold it.

Sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba, sakshat Jagadamba.

Leave it. Better now? Much relief. Alright?

I mean, now left side. Put your left hand towards Me, right hand up there. Left hand towards Me, right hand like that…

Hmm. Like this. Douglas (Fry), like this. Better? It’s liver. Over-thinking gives you liver also. Better. Better? Much better. It’s coming down.

…Hmm. Better now? What is it? Where do you feel? Vishuddhi?

Better now.

H.H. Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi