Birthday Puja: Our maryadas

Kew Ashram, Melbourne (Australia)


Birthday Puja. Melbourne (Australia), 17 March 1985.

I am very joyous today to see all of you celebrating my birthday as well as having the national programme same day. It’s a good combination we have in the month of March. It’s regarded as springtime in India – madhumas (मधुमास). That’s what you sing, madhumas. And as you know 21st March is the equinox, so it is a balance and also the centre of all the signs you have in the horoscope.

So many centres I had to achieve and also I was born on the Tropic of Cancer as you are on the Tropic of Capricorn, and Ayers Rock is on the Tropic of Capricorn – just in the centre. So, so many combinations had to be worked out.

So the principle of ascent is to be in the centre, to be in the balance, to be in the maryadas of the centre, to be in the boundaries of the centre, is the principle.

So what happens when we do not keep to the boundaries, to the maryadas? Then we get caught up. If we keep to maryadas we can never be caught up. Many people say, “Why have the maryadas?” Say we have the maryada, the boundaries of this beautiful ashram here and somebody is attacking you from all the sides, on all the sides of the void, so if you go out of the void you get caught up. That’s why you have to keep to the boundaries. And to keep to the boundaries is difficult when you have two problems: one is the ego, another is the superego.

Now, as, in the West, superego is not such a problem. Ego is the problem. And it has very, very subtle implications now. I can see the complicated styles of egos we have. One is a gross, like Khomeini style, which is dry, it’s obvious, evident; everybody can condemn. That one is the one [that] either one corrects or gets completely destroyed. But ego, if it is of a stupid person, then he behaves in this manner only, that he doesn’t know how to hide his ego in sophistication. But the Western ego is extremely sophisticated. The language, everything, is very sophisticated. Like in English language we’ll say, “I’m afraid I have to slap you!” (laughing) “I’m sorry I have to kill you!” It’s such a devious thing, you see. Once you said “I am sorry” that means you have put a chocolate on top of that, isn’t it? It’s such a camouflage. You must understand! You see, we must face [ourselves] as we are, we cannot be facing something else. But this is exactly what happens with sophistication – that we avoid facing ourselves.

Today, though the day is of celebration, so in all humour we should understand what this stupid thing called ego is, in all humour, not in seriousness, because I don’t want you again to feel guilty! (laughter)

Now as I was explaining, in the morning, how ego becomes the Left Vishuddhi. I mean, even before going to the hall, my attention on the hall, I get a big lump here, just, just painful horrible, excruciating! I mean all the time it has been there, since I have been in the West. Can you imagine? It has never vanished. So this chakra is all the time working, poor thing is so much now tired, Vishnumaya’s chakra.

So what happens, really, we should see the physical side of it. It’s very important to understand it. You see, from childhood, if we are taught in a society like this, where you are an extrovert, you have to achieve something, some success or this and that, then the idea of strength is given to you, that it is weakness to tolerate something.

Imagine, in Christian nations that’s the best part of it! “I’m sorry I will kill you!” sort of a thing. In Christian nation, you see, they have this theory that it is weakness that if you tolerate anything, it is a weakness if you get dominated by someone. You can never be successful if you do like that. So unless and until you are possessed you can never be obedient. This is what it is.

Somebody has to possess you, absolutely possess you like Hitler, then you can be obedient; otherwise everybody has a big ego. As I had told you the story of the garbage cleaner. So everybody has a very, very big ego. Everybody wants to have their own way. And from childhood you spoil your children too much. You spoil them, completely spoil them. All the time you will hug them, you’ll hold them, you’ll do too much so children get spoiled, think no end of themselves. And then on top of that, if you tell them that you should not tolerate anything, they become disobedient. So you do not know how to obey others in any way. Ego does not know how to obey, because that is weakness, obedience is weakness.

So now, this poor thing ego has a limited, limited thing. That is, this ego has a balloon, which is limited. But it bursts when you get your paralysis and all those things, it does burst, but it is flexible also. So when the ego starts getting too much on top of the superego, then the superego can go up to a point; it is also there. So to get rid of the ego people take drinks, drugs, just to push it back; so, increase the superego so the ego comes down. So you are playing between. Then you have a hangover! Then it goes on like this, you see, works out. This is the modern solution they find for ego otherwise ego is too much.

So when somebody says something to you, instead of facing up to it – supposing you find you have not been able to find a glass for me, a simple thing like that, [then] you sulk. Why? Why should you sulk for that? Because there’s another place where this ego can go, is when you come round, you see here it crosses at Vishuddhi, so when it is suppressed from the other side it goes into that Vishuddhi part. So then you get the Left Vishuddhi. It is nothing but pure ego, believe me, it’s pure ego. Because it has no other way to get in, it goes there. And that’s how you sulk and think. Think so you get more ego. You fill up your Left Side and you sulk. You never face [it].

Now. The practical way, the central path, is established by being in reality. Now as a matter of habit you must develop. Supposing something has gone wrong, tell yourself, “Yes it has gone wrong, because I have done the mistake. Alright, why did I do the mistake? Because of this. So next time no.” But it’s very easy to avoid everything, come to this and enjoy your ego feeling sad. It’s an indulgence. And others also feel, “Oh, he’s felt ‘I’m sorry I’ve killed you!’,” you see. He feels sorry for it.

Yes! I have seen! It is gone so far in the minds of the Western people that there are laws which really forgive people who should never be forgiven. They also try to forgive people. Because of this left nonsensical Vishuddhi which indulges into the Left Side, you feel sympathy for such people, who should not have been forgiven! Like there’s one fellow who has murdered so many people, put them into gas chambers. He’s arrested now. He’s a liability now, big liability as a prisoner kept somewhere because they had to keep everything very much closed, and this and that, so to maintain such a dog there was very difficult for English people. But they are maintaining this one prisoner. I have forgotten his name; horrible fellow whosoever it is. “Now he has been there. He’s old.” Let him die there! What is there to have pity? Just hang him out and finish. He has killed so many people. “No, but how can you do that?” You must keep this doggy there! Though he’s consuming the money of all the people, though he has killed thousands and thousands and thousands in gas chamber, he’s been such a horrid fellow. There should be no sympathy. In the Divine laws he would be finished in no time. He’s dissipating every day, but even now I read articles in sympathy with him. “Now what is he going to do wrong? Why not leave him alone?” This is how you play in to the hands of horrible people by your Left Vishuddhi, first of all.

So this Left Vishuddhi is nothing but purely, purely ego and then you bend your head like that, you walk like this. Now with this Left Vishuddhi though, you have many, many physical problems. But the worst of all will be lunacy. The other day somebody told me that, at the age of forty years, now, in America, people are suddenly becoming lunatic and it’s a very big sickness, just like they have it in that horrible disease called AIDS; in that way it is spreading.

Now I must tell you as your Mother, very clearly, that this is the part this horrible Left Vishuddhi plays. Do not indulge into it. If you have an ego, that’s why it’s Left Vishuddhi so face up to yourself!

Like today Warren’s idea was that he came and told me that “In India when we go, we think that the people, whatever we suggest first start with ‘No, no!’ ” So, actually that “No, no!” is because we are brought up a different way, to face up to it. We are brought up that way. That’s why Indians are never guilty. If they are guilty know that they are westernised. They are never guilty. So now, at that time when they say, “No” to something…ninety nine percent, not the people who are in the cities, they are same style of heads, because you have blessed them nicely, but in the villages. You see they tell themselves, “No, no! How I could have done it? Alright, if I have done it I’d better correct it.” “No, no!” It starts with “No, no!”

But a Western person might hear this “No, no” and he’ll think, “He’s just punching my ego!” Because still that ego is there to dominate others. Still this ego thinks they are much better organisers. Still this one thinks they are cleaner people than others, they are higher people than others. All this ego thinks like that and builds you up and you live on top; like [with] a balloon or a ring that is bloated you keep on the surface, and that’s why don’t want the air to get out, because you know, you’ll sink into yourself. So one lives on that and you start thinking you know it better. If anybody says anything to you, one feels hurt – again Left Vishuddhi. If Mother says anything – again Left Vishuddhi.

So you have all ready made a pouch there, being in the West. We should face as we are. Now that pouch is there so anything I say – now even if I am saying now – you should not feel guilty. Let’s see! Not feel guilty. Be on your Spirit so you see yourself and you can clear out. If you see from your Spirit’s angle you clear out that which you have accumulated since long.

Left Vishuddhi is the problem today of the West, I tell you. All these problems are coming from Left Vishuddhi, but which is not, in no way, that they’re subdued. On the contrary [at] any moment this Left Vishuddhi can blow in again into the ego. You see, I have seen this in the West – very common. People are walking straight forward everything is alright. Even in the cities of India we have seen it. You make them into trustees, suddenly they jump on the horse. I said, “From where did they jump in the horse? From where this ego has come?” That was all stored up here you see. As soon as they become trustees the whole thing comes back! And they are sitting like John Gilpin on a horse going fast and I start looking at them, where are they going? They were just there; disappeared! Vanishing tricks.

I just can’t understand why it happens. But after penetrating into the problems. Because I see just going to the hall you get the Left Vishuddhi.

But look at the children. You see from childhood, don’t teach them all the time to say, “I am sorry, I am sorry.” Our Parsees in India have very much affectation from you, very much. So in the morning we never want to see a Parsee because early in the morning he’ll come and start saying, “I am sorry, I am sorry.” This is inauspicious! “Maaf karo, Maaf karo,” People say, “Baba! You come in the afternoon! This is not the time. Morning time don’t start with this!” (laughter) We don’t say like this. It’s inauspicious. You open the door and somebody is standing with “Maaf karo!” “For what? What have I done?”

What have you done that you are saying like this, all the time in an apologetic mood? For what? You don’t want to see an apologetic face in the morning time do you? Something pleasant, nice coming to greet you. And here they say “Maaf karo, maaf karo, I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry.” It’s a very common thing that we don’t want to see a Parsee in the morning. The reason is this: if you see them in the morning the whole day you are in a bad state because you have seen somebody apologetic. But it is not apology. They are extremely egoistical people. If you study their character, they are very egoistical.

So this one has to understand: that when we start dealing with our ego we, must directly deal with it. We are not ego, we are the Spirit. Directly! “Oh I see. So it was wrong. So it was done by not me, by this body. Now, come along. No, no! Better be alright!” You tell yourself, “No, no! Better be alright!” That’s how we are going to deal with it. Because this is what is frightening me – is this Left Vishuddhi. Because when I thought of this disease, my attention went to Left Vishuddhi. Imagine people becoming lunatic! And most of the egoistical people, I find, become stupid because of that. They are stupid. They behave stupidly.

And the egoistical people, only, take to drugs and to drink, so much because they can stand it. Supposing a person who is very superego, supposing a man who is possessed takes to drinks – he’ll die very soon, he won’t live; because he’s thrown more that side. But the egoistical people can stand. I mean, a person who is not egoistical, like an Indian, if he takes a vodka he’ll be blown off the shores! Absolutely nowhere to be found, lost! Even in lost and found he won’t be there! (laughter)

But it’s that ego of yours that has resistance for the superego and that’s how you manage it. That’s why people can drink. It has nothing to do with the cold weather or anything, it’s more your ego.

Now when you call [yourself] also ‘Left Sided’ sometimes you make a big mistake. You are not! You live with that myth because that’s how you can excuse your ego. Because basically Western people are egoistical – we must accept this fact. We are not Western people, we belong to the realm of God, so don’t feel guilty! (laughter) You are no more Western. To me you are neither Indian, nor English nor Australians, you are my children.

But some of these things are hanging around, so you be careful. What I am telling you [is] this will happen to all of you, in a little way but not much. So be careful, it is outside, outside the maryadas where you little bit get out, you find this. So those who think also they are Left Sided, are only possessed people. Because they are possessed that’s why they become Left Sided; otherwise they are not, by temperament they are not. Because there is no tradition, there’s no conditioning accepted, nothing. There has been no conditioning on them of any kind. So there are hardly to be found any tamasikas in the West, hardly to be found. So what do we have are the people who are egoistical but get possessed.

So these possessions take charge of your ego and they work through your ego, so they are much more dangerous than the ordinary tamasikas. An ordinary tamasikas who even gets possessed, he dies very soon. Otherwise he just troubles himself: he gets body pains, he gets all those troubles himself. But when a person who is egoistical is also possessed then he becomes a troublesome person.

In India if people drink, you will be surprised, they become very nice people: extremely mild, very quiet, very good. I mean some women told me, “We want them to drink because they are better.” But not here. They become violent. Why? Because there is already the base for the ego and these fellows who jump in from the Left Side or Right Side, whatever it is, take over the ego. And they work through the ego then. So such people become cruel, assertive.

I mean, all Germans were dealt like that. They were all possessed by supraconscious bhoots and they all behaved in this atrocious manner. Imagine any human being, human being, killing millions of people with the gas chamber!! Can you think of it? I mean, you can’t even see a little chicken being cut in your presence. How can you see so many people just there, being gassed before you, trying to get out of the gas chambers? And they were all transparent so you could see them! See the cruelty to which they could go. How? They were possessed, and possessed by egoistical temperament. So these bhoots also used their ego and did it.

So we are in the centre, we are the people who have ascended to God’s level [so] we have no business to have Left Vishuddhi on any point. We have no ego. Where is the ego? It’s finished. Where is the superego? Finished.

So if there is even a lurking thing of that, you just face up to it. Why do you feel guilty? For what? Nonsense!

And that’s how you get rid of it. Because I have seen with Sahaja Yogis also suddenly their nose will blow out, their eyes will come out, suddenly they’ll talk like this and I get a fright. I said, “What’s the matter? He was a normal person, why is he talking like this now?” The reason is that hidden ego suddenly jumps up and shows. It’s with many Indians also, those who are city dwellers are horribly egoistical and you have blessed them, as I told you. So they also behave in the same manner.

But because there is tradition of keeping in the centre in any country – like China has the same, I have seen, China has the same. I haven’t seen them ever say, “I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry.” And they don’t even discuss. Russians have been so bad to them. “It’s alright,”. We asked them, “Why did you cut off from the Russians?” They said, “Forget it!” They never criticise, sit down and criticise, “They did like this,” or sulk about it or think about it – nothing!

Like Indians, now, you will be surprised: we have a law that we are not supposed to make any films against the English. Can you imagine? Because they left our country in grace. Even Shivaji’s pictures are not allowed because maybe it will show that the Muslims are bad. To that extent we go. Because forget it, forget it, forget it. When you start thinking about that person your ego gets hit. It is a ego which is hurt.

Now you can blow this balloon by two methods, perhaps you know that, by blowing into it or removing all the air from outside, or even by hitting.

So the hurt ego is where the outside is getting vacated and the balloon is increasing. And the other ego, pumped up ego, is that when the balloon is filled with that air. Both things are just the same. I mean, the result is the same whether you do it this way or that way.

So, once you understand the physical manifestation of this, not only that you develop all these diseases but also develop a thing called lunacy at a very, very young age, because you don’t know how to cope with yourself.

So the best way is to, if you have done something, forgive yourself at that point: “I forgive myself at this point, alright. And that this was done because of this – alright, so I should not have done this. Never I’m not going to do it again!” Just say like that. Just absolutely neutralise it. Unless and until you neutralise it you again store it up there: that’s the point is.

Secondly I have to tell you that the women in the West have changed their styles, which is very, very dangerous for their society, because they have also taken to the egoistical ways of men. So if men have gone say ten feet they have run after them again, about say eight feet and pulled back men even to go further than them.

Now this is completely crossing your egos, because women do not have such possibility of egos normally. So competing [with] men in ego, what you did, you have lost your complete maryadas of a woman. There’s no maryada of a woman.

Man has a maryada of a man. If a man starts behaving like a woman, he’s not a man.

In the same way, the women, if they start behaving like men, then they are no more women. They have lost their maryadas. They are out. So they get possessed. And that’s why women, when they are egoistical they become horrid: their faces become horrid, they look horrid, their whole behaviour is horrid. They can become dry like bean sticks and could be so hard as to hit you like an iron rod.

And they say, “The lady with the iron rod in her hand.”

All this happens because we have a maryada, we are the style as we are. If it’s a rose, it’s a rose. Be happy that you are a flower of rose. Now the rose wants to become the thorn! So we lose all our maryadas.

Today I will be speaking to you before we start this here when the people are coming before that, to the ladies and tell them what’s gone wrong with them. And that is how you must know that the plight of the West is not by men, but by women.

Women have ruined the society of West, Western society. It’s the Indian women who have kept the society intact. All my, really, thanks to their solid behaviour towards life. It is the women of this country who have ruined all that was so delicate, emotional, beautiful: love, affection, compassion.

Women are there to give joy and happiness and emotional security to the whole society. While they take over, “Do this! Give that! Do that! This!” Even the husbands have become just like servants in the house. “You haven’t done the cleaning properly! You haven’t cleaned the kitchen properly!” I went to England and I was surprised – all kitchen cleaning and all that is so well done in England. You see, you have everything for cleaning this, cleaning that. I said, “Why it has happened?” It’s the men, you see, they had to do it so they found out all the ways and methods! (laughter)

“Has to be sparkling? Alright, sparkling you want? I’ll get you such a thing that if you put in your hand your hand will burn!” All the acids put everywhere; with a big glove in the hand put it everywhere. And everything gets alright.

Then the children suffer, because that’s the job of a gardener. Beautiful things that are born to be looked after with that kindness. But you over-indulge into your children in the beginning. A mother is like a gardener, she has to prune also, she has to cut also so [that] the growth is alright. If you child is spoilt you’re no good a mother, useless you are! But you groom your husband not your children – just the other way round – because ego is towards your husband all the time grooming. “Sit here! Go there! What’s this?” Money business, “Give me all the money! I keep all the money!” everything.

Now one may say that the law is such. If the law is stupid, the Sahaja Yoginis should not take to such a law. That law has ruined you all, I tell you. Because this is such an important part of life, it is such an important area of life that it should not have suffered. Where affection, love, kindness, all that is required is missing, then you become people without any meaning. Life is aimless. You don’t know what to do. That’s why the children commit suicide. And then the love should be such that they should be pruned. For that you must have wisdom which, also, one does not develop, because if you run after your Mooladhara Chakra how can you have wisdom?

Here men have befooled you completely. Completely they have befooled you, take it from me. You must keep your wisdom intact. And not only that they have befooled you, but they themselves have stooped down to befool you. So they have their devious methods. They are not straightforward then.

So, as Sahaja Yogis we are above all these things. We have reached the state where we are above. We are here for correcting all those things that have gone wrong in the society, because Sahaja Yoga faces towards the society, not towards yourself only. So at this stage we have to understand [that] what we have to do is: first of all our own understanding should be such. Even now with all this movement of Sahaja Yoga understanding, women don’t realise that they have to be like women. I have seen them. They still, “What’s wrong?” Still go on. And men don’t understand that they have to be like men. Even after so many days. And if they they become really like men, women will appreciate them. And if you become really like women, men will appreciate you. You see, it’s the opposites that attract each other, that should be normal. But we live in abnormal way that the men are women and the women are men. What do you do now?

So it is very important for men to understand now – because I am going to talk to women later on (laughter) – that they should become like men. They must fix up things, they must take decisions, they must be the one who must rule. But that’s outward. Actually it’s the source, is the woman. The woman is the potential and man is the kinetic. For example, there’s a fan moving. Movement of the fan is the kinetic force, but the potential force that is within us is the one which is the electricity, which is coming from the source. Which is higher? The fan that moves or the source? Let the women decide and men understand.

But if that source dries out and wants to become the fan, no fan will work out: upside down situation. If you realise you are the source, you are the one who is going to give all the shakti to men, you will stop behaving like men.

It doesn’t mean that you cannot go to work, you cannot do; but take to work which is more suitable to women. Like I would not like a woman to have a bus driver’s job or a truck driver or wrestler!(laughter) No. I’m not telling, I’m telling from experience:

Once I was travelling, I was a student at that time, in Lahore, you see, and I was travelling by train and at some station, you see, the train stopped in the night and a lady came and she said, “Open the door for me!” So I said, “But it’s so crowded, alright I’ll try, I’ll try.”

And she said. “If You don’t open I can break it.” I said, “How can you?” She said, “You don’t know who I am?” I said, “Who?” She said, “I am Hamida Banu!” I said, ‘Who’s Hamida Banu?” “The wrestler lady!” “Oh, baba!” I said, “Thank God! I’ll open it!” (laughter)  I said, “If you are a wrestler lady why are you coming in the ladies department? Why don’t you go to the men’s?” And she pushed the door so violently! She came up; I looked at her; I said,  “Wow! What a person!”  (laughter) And she sat down with her whole countenance and everything, her gait and state of sitting, everything was so manly, like that she sat down. She said, “Now, come along now! Those who want to say I should not sit here.” I said, “Nobody wants that now, Madam, you sit comfortably. But we’ll have to get somebody from the other compartment to have wrestling!” And then she was quiet. And she was really, I saw her all her muscles so overdeveloped and she was really looking like I would say a Western cow, we can say. (laughter) Like the cows here look like buffalos, not like cows. Something very funny I cannot forget that, you see that experience. I was very young and I felt like laughing but I couldn’t even laugh. I thought she’ll box my face! (laughter). So this is what it is, that we are ending up there! You must know that. How far are we going? Are we going to become wrestlers?

So this is what it is, one has to learn that it has been there for ages; ages it has been there. I have read books, some books, old books; I have seen some films also, where they have shown even in olden times [that] the women used to have broom in their hands hitting their husband sort of thing.

We, too, have some of them, ‘blessed’, in India. But they are very, very few. Very few women like that, not a big number. But it may increase, God knows, so keep your fingers crossed! But I would say that this is what is happening.

So with too much ego of men which goes into Left Vishuddhi they say, “Now, let the women take over! It’s alright, let them be satisfied. No more of their aggression. Let them have their own.” So they do what they like. Men are not bothered and they go into their Left this thing [Vishuddhi]. There’s no enjoyment of marriage or love.

So now we had yesterday the other marriage: for the benefit of your children, for the goodness of them, take your roles as women and men. Your roles are as women and men and you will see [that] you will enjoy it. The quarrel should be on that role. The man wants to do something for you, you should say, “No, no, no! How can you do? That’s too much for me. Let me do this work.” As I have told you, many a times, how my husband when he gets angry he wants to wash his undershirt to show he’s angry. Or when he’s very angry then he will clean the bathroom! But he does it so badly that I know that it is he has done. I feel like laughing but I dare not because I must keep his spirit on! And then he starts talking in a very respectable way to everyone – ‘thou’. He calls everyone ‘thou’. He says, “Thou are like that, thou are like that,” so I know now he is really angry for something. But he won’t say what is he angry with! Then we have to find out what is he angry with, and if so, don’t feel guilty – correct it.

You see there are so many ways of neutralising the anger. The first thing that happens with ego is the anger. As yesterday you got married, you must know how to neutralise this, because still ego is there. Now to find out how to neutralise the anger of another person is a very beautiful thing which I have never seen your writers handling, but in India we have many writers who have handled the situation.

Now you must find out what are the weak points of your husband, first of all, and of your wife. On what points she gets upset. Now the attitude should be we should not upset her, we should not make her angry, and another attitude of the wife the same way, much more for the husband.

So now, what are the soft points on which he really gets upset? Just study! It’s very simple. And laugh at it. Don’t take it seriously, but be careful to avoid that. Now also find out what makes him happy. Like if I am really sometimes – I never get angry, as you know that, I never get angry, but if I am showing off my anger just …

(A small child shouts with joy)

Let it be, let it be. It’s alright. Sit down! He understands Sahaja Yog!


So, now, how to show that, how to neutralise an anger of a person?

Say now, supposing I am trying to show [anger]: if you put a child in my lap – finished! Anger is gone. I cannot show anger with a child on my lap! It’s simple.

So you must find out. Like my husband, if he’s angry, supposing: I know him. Then if I tell him that “What about getting me a nice sari.” Ah, finished! then he’s very happy. He says, “Ah, I have done him the greatest favour!” you see. Like that, you see, you must find out what thing pleases your husband, what thing pleases your wife, and neutralise it.

And, you see, little things like that you must learn. This is the art of living, this is the art of living a Sahaja Yogi life. It’s the art of living: how with little, few things, how you manage.

Now you must have seen how in my lecture I say quite serious things, but in your bubbles of laughter it just settles down in your mind, that’s how you should do it. Because humour is one of the greatest things that puts the thing through, makes the person understand, and it doesn’t harm anyone. That’s how things improve.

And when you see that you are settled down in peace – that’s the first thing a husband and wife must do is to settle down in peace – children feel alright, everyone feels alright. And then gradually let it correct. You have no responsibility of correcting each other. But if you have married somebody who is not a Sahaja Yogini, who is horrid and all that, then the question is very different. But both are Sahaja Yogis married before me, should be the easiest thing to do.

And protect each other, look after each other. There should be complete confidence. And this we have in our country, really I must say. Our marriage system has something special about it.

What happened, once I went to Singapore you will be surprised, in the early times, I was going to America: and there was one horrible diplomat’s wife, she came drunk to the program and she was asked to get out because she was drunk. So she informed our Prime Minister Indira Gandhi that, “This lady is doing this kind of work and She should not do this. She is a diplomat’s wife and She’s so highly placed and this and that.” So Indira Gandhi, without understanding anything, told one fellow who was Huxher, who was her main person that, “You go and tell Mr. Srivastav that this should not be done and she should be brought back.” So the minister, you see, getting a message for Indira Gandhi means the death blow has come to the minister that time. So he sent for my husband. And he called him and he said that, “We think you wife should be called back and this is what has happened.” And he said, “Why? Why do you want to call Her? She doesn’t drink, she doesn’t smoke. She doesn’t do anything wrong. She’s the most decent woman, She’s very dignified and she knows what she’s doing. She’s doing good work for no money at all. She’s doing nothing wrong and if you want I’ll resign but I’ll not call her.” And he got a fright of his life, because if he resigns who’s going to do the job? So capable! He just said, “I’ll resign.” And they were all shocked at it the way he was confident. And this I came to know through somebody else, himself – the minister who was dead, half dead with the message from the Prime Minister! You see? And he then sent back – he also got [strength], you see, within himself! He said, “I know the lady very well, she’s very dignified. She’s a very decent lady. She’s very dharmic. We shouldn’t disturb her.” While the fellow Huxher who had sent the message also got a shock and he pushed back the shock to Indira Gandhi! Since then she has never, never tried to interfere with my work. You will be surprised. She has never tried to interfere. This is my husband’s confidence in my work, and understanding. That you should have. You must know your wife and know your husband: they cannot do such and such thing.

Same about your children. You must have full confidence in them. You must know what they are, what they are up to, how far they can go. And then this confidence, an inner understanding is the one road to peace, love and affection. Complete confidence into each other. Wherever they may be. I can say with confidence, you send my daughters anywhere, they’ll never take to adharmic life, nor my son-in-laws, but [about] my own daughters I can tell you. They can never think of adharmic life, whatever you may try. It should be that confidence within you about your own children.

Like they were small, very small and the neighbours came and said that, “Your daughters came and were using this, our garden, for morning ablution.” I said. “What?” I said, “My children, even if they can go into your bathroom, you take them. I’ll give you two thousand rupees just now, right now! You just ask them to go to your bathroom, that’s all.” I know them too well. If somebody will say that, “Your daughter has taken something,” I know them too well, they can never touch anybody’s things. I know them too well. They’ll never take any obligation from anyone like that. I know them too well.

So that’s what: you should know your children too well. Don’t insult them in the presence of others. Build up their character and majesty by saying, “Come along, you are a Sahaja Yogi. You are great, you’ll be this, that,” and put them on that path. Keep them there. Respect them. But don’t spoil them. Don’t spoil them. We normally spoil. Either we are over-indulgent or you make them over-indulgent, both things are wrong; is again ego.

Tell them how to share things. Tell them how to share. And like if they share. If they give it to somebody else you should be happy, it’s given to others. “Give this to others, let the others play.” You show your happiness on that. You, yourself, give to others, then the children learn all these things.

So marriage is a very big bondage for Sahaja Yoga. Through marriages we are all bound together. It’s all a society of very happily married people. Now, if somebody is not capable of having a good marriage, better forget about it! Forget it! See, after all I have seen women of sixty, of my age, asking for a marriage. Yes! There are women and men and they are sixty years, “Mother, I am only sixty and I would like to get married.” I said, “ What??” At sixty I have thousands of children, how can you say such a thing? I mean, you should not be a bride all your life. You should be a mother and a grandmother.

I think after forty-five nobody should think of marriage – is nonsense. It’s nonsense. After forty-five all the, even, married women should know they are mothers and they are going to be grandmothers. They are all the time brides. That’s why, that’s one of the reasons, why marriages fail. Because you are not a bride after say, thirty years of age or thirty-five years of age, you are a mother, absolute mother you are. And you are a father, and that’s how you live as father and mother of the children. We are called like that in our country. Till the age of thirty, thirty years, we are called as the brides like dulhan (दुल्हन – bride). But once you are grown up – I am never called as my name by anyone. They say “Kalpana’s Mother” or “Sadhana’s Mother.” Or even my husband is called as “Kalpana’s father,” He is never called by his name, because you become a father and a mother. Accept that position! But no, you want to be brides at that age. So you want to have all the bed like a bride has, all the bedroom thing like a bride has, and the bedroom thing and it doesn’t work out. Because you are no more a bride. And then you think, “Oh, this man has become insipid,” “This woman has become insipid,” then you go to another woman, another man. It goes on. Then you go to children and spoil the innocence of the people. But if you accept, grow properly, mature like Sahaja Yogis, as father and mother, as dignified people.

It’s not the source of love only as husbands’ or wives’ relationship, there are so many relationships, which are a greater source. But it depends on at what point you are. When you are a small little river, alright; but now you have become the ocean, so become the ocean. When you become the sea, become the sea. When you become the ocean, you become the ocean. A sea cannot remain like a little, little small little beginning, can it? In the same way everyone must know that they must grow out from this relationship and should not go on hankering all the time that husband and wife. Like [at] forty-five years of age they are still finding out their husbands! Are they mad? This should stop in our Sahaja Yoga now. All those who have gone beyond a certain age should stop bothering me about marriages – should become mothers. There are so many children to be looked after, we are going to have nurseries, better be there. What is it, what is the companionship? The companionship is with children, with the grandchildren, with great-grandchildren. This is what one has to understand, men and women, both.

Men are just the same. Men also try [to] never become fathers. If you are full-fledged fathers, you don’t have these ideas of marriage – forget it! If it doesn’t work out with one woman, forget it! Then forget it. No need. You have had enough of it.

So this kind of thing is not necessary at all, and it has worked in a society which is not a Sahaja Yogi society. So it should work in you. So [in] social ways Indians are quite good, but they are bad in economics and politics. Never follow their politics – horrid! Horrid! I mean, I can’t think of a worse politics that Indian politics. It’s the worst of all. If you listen to that you will not know whether to cry or laugh! It’s such idiots! All donkeys have gone into politics! Absolutely donkeys! Worse than that. They bray like donkeys, they behave like donkeys, they kick each other, they do all kind of things. Can you imagine? It’s so horrifying. I mean, if you want to have a joke then you can look at it from a joke point of view: of the donkeys behaving like, absolutely, as if they are in charge of our great country. So most of them are donkeys. I have not come across many who are sensible. And those who are sensible also want to become donkeys. What to do? That is their greatest desire! Imagine a saint wants to become a donkey!

So let us know that whatever are our good points are our good points that we should not lose. Whatever are our bad points we should correct them. This is a very balanced view towards oneself. Because we are the gainer. Nobody else is going to gain. And Sahaja Yogis have to be selfish about it. We are the gainers. If we gain, the whole body gains; the whole of Sahaja Yoga gains.

So this is what I am telling you about your social life which is very important, and about your ego. But the most important thing is that once you are in the Sahasrara you become my brain, you become really my brain. And so you have to be very careful because you’re not thinking about your family, your children, your household. You’re not thinking about Melbourne Ashram or Sydney Ashram or Australia, but you are thinking about the whole world and the whole universe, and the betterment of it. When you grow to that state you become really part and parcel of my brain, which is concerned with very bigger visions, higher things. It works on lower levels also, that’s something good about it but it can work on your individual levels. I pay attention to your individual problems, to your individual suggestions, to anything that you say, but the light is for the whole universe. So we enter into the realm of universal religion, which we have to awaken, which we have to work out.

Unless and until you achieve that state you will not be called full-fledged Sahaja Yogis. So, to achieve that you must work hard.

Or we can call: now you are Sahaja Yogis, you will become Maha Yogis. So, we have to achieve that state of Maha Yog. From this to that is very simple, works out. Imagine four years back I never thought that I will be able to establish so many of you here as my children, and it has happened today. It’s such a great thing that in four years we have been able to achieve such beautiful results. And next year will be greater still. I can see from the way people were there.

So, one has to understand in Sahaja Yoga obedience to what Mother says is alright. But some people have a bad habit of taking up over, “For Mother’s sake do it. For Mother.” Who is the person? Why should anybody say that, “Do it for Mothers sake”? Or “Mother says so!” No! When you are the Spirit you understand what Mother says. So try to understand your Spirit: that’s the best way you can work it out and you can be nice.

I want all our children to grow from that height. Let them start with a better standards, from a better levels, because we started from a lower levels, we had problems. But let our children start from a higher level. And Melbourne is the place I’ve chosen for our children to grow.

So I hope women will take their roles, men will take their roles and it will be a nice family system built here, a nice society and this nice society.

What’s it? Put if off.

I know! (applause)

I know the lights very well. I know how they act. Vishnumaya. That’s Vishnumaya. We have harnessed the Vishnumaya. From where did we get light? Vishnumaya. Hidden where?

The Vishnumaya is the one that we need today, and to understand it in a subtle way how the Vishnumaya comes in. See now how sahaj! This thing came there [so] I could speak on Vishnumaya. Because to shift the subject on Vishnumaya is not easy! (laughter)

See! You must see the play. You must see the play.

Now this Vishnumaya, how does it come? How it acts? Through me, yes. So where? How, what happens? From where does it come? Hydroelectric! How hydroelectric works? In water! It is in water, in the Guru Tattwa. But when? When it comes down! When the Guru Tattwa has come down to you. On that level the Vishnumaya acts, that liberates and acts. For what? For enlightening. What happens in the gross happens in the subtle. So, one has to take an incarnation. So the Guru principle has to take an incarnation; to come down to this earth. So, Vishnumaya acts and enlightens people.

And this is what it is. And how the whole thing works out.

Now you have seen how I could change the topic suddenly to that! And you didn’t feel it. But I just wanted you to see how Mother changes the topics, because there are some incidents, something happens somewhere, which I know, and it changes. And it looks like a smooth, one subject going on.

Another thing I have to tell you that all of you must know Sahaja Yoga full well. Very few people really know about Kundalini, really know about vibrations. They do not know where is the Void – there should be a regular class even for grown up Sahaja Yogis – where is the Void on the feet, where are the chakras on the feet. When I tell them to rub my Feet they don’t know where it is.

You may be uneducated, doesn’t matter, but in Sahaja Yoga you should be educated. You should have full education in Sahaja Yoga. You must know where is this disease coming from, how to cure it. Every one of you should be educated in it.

So when you have your meditation class also you must have a class to educate yourself about Sahaja Yoga – what are the things to be done.

Now there’s a book, of course I saw, that’s a good book they have written about the children, but there’s no spontaneity. So I’ll have to work it out. But it’s not only the books but my tapes are there.

When you are listening to my tapes, note down the points what Mother has said, and see for yourself. So the education in Sahaja Yoga is very important, otherwise your intelligence will rust out. You must have full education of Sahaja Yoga. Only giving Realisation is not the work. You must have, so others must know you are knowledgeable.

The amount of education you have had nobody had before, no saint had it. So now take full advantage. Whatever your age may be, education qualification may be, what doesn’t matter but you should all know what is Sahaja Yog, what it means, how it works out. Ask questions yourself and find answers.

You all are still students of Sahaja Yoga – you must know that. You are still students of Sahaja Yoga and you must master it, you must know it, every word of it. Just to enjoy Sahaja Yoga is not the point, you must also know. Like, if you enjoy a cake cooked by somebody, you must know how it is cooked because then you can cook for others. But if you don’t know how to cook people are not going to believe you. This is what I have seen.

Then I have seen some Sahaja Yogis are all the time doing the work, they are active because they have been active before. But some are lethargic. You can see even among two Indian people you will find the same difference, though they are here or they may be there. It should not be. Everybody should try to create the same kind of an enthusiasm and dynamism: not one person. If one person does it, then it’s no use. Sometimes such a one person can be very dominating also. Everybody should work, the whole body has to work. If we can develop that, that will help the complete development, upliftment (sic). Alright?

So today on this day of my birthday, I want to bless you very much, but every birthday is reducing my age you must know that, and so you must grow up now to take over, it’s important. It’s very important that you must grow up. This so-called age of mine, though it doesn’t show but it is decreasing, you must know that. And so you have to now fasten your movements, get to it, work it out. When others come, talk to them nicely, give them joy, don’t give them any [headache]. Give them joy, look after them, be kind to them. That is going to be attractive than to, immediately somebody says, “You are a bhoot you get out!”

When they are in Sahaja Yoga, when they are there, I will tell them off. There are still, I know some of them still here. We have to tell them that, “You have a problem, you better get out.” It’s alright, they’ll have to get out of the ashram for a while then come back. It has to be like that, otherwise they cannot be corrected. And such people must accept gladly that they should be alright, they must change, they must be better than to continue with whatever they have because of their ego.

So try to co-operate with your Self because it wants to be better, and better and better. So all those people whom I’ll be asking, I’ll tell Warren, whom those people whom I find are not alright should get out of ashram! Ashram is not a place where all kinds of people should stay. Here only the pure up to a point they should be. There should be certain minimum standard they must have. If they do not have that standard, they get out. Even if there’s a woman who is dominating, or a man who is like a woman, has to get out. You have to be normal people, otherwise others who come and they see one man standing like a chicken cut from here (the neck), you see, they just don’t feel impressed! (laughing) I tell you! Like a miserable Christ you see as I showed you, standing there limply like that. I don’t know who feels impressed by that? You must have somebody like you have Christ in the Sistine Chapel, standing like a (inaudible) that’s how the men should be, but dignified, respectable, kindly, majestic is alright.

And the women should be very sweet and nice. It pays a very, very long and a great dividend. Very, very, long! You don’t know how much it has paid me. It is coming so handy today to me. When I was not doing Sahaja Yoga by my nature I have been kind to people, and all that has come [handy]. One example I’ll give you: in London one fellow came, his name is Commissioner of Pune, he’s now commissioner of Pune. He came to see us, we had a meeting of my husband’s office or something. CP said, “I’ll call them for dinner.” I said, “Alright.” I had cooked the dinner at home; they were about twenty-five people who came to dinner. They had dinner I must have looked after them, whatever it is. So when I went to Pune, Mehrotra, told me that this commissioner is very anxious that he should come as the president or the chairman or the reception committee. He must receive me. I said, “I don’t remember who is this gentleman? I remember somebody with the same name.”

He said, “No, no, no, no this is another one.” Now this is one of them who had come and he praised me so much! I was amazed how he saw all that. He said, “This lady whose husband is so highly placed in life, is so humble. She is so kind, so motherly.” And he went home and told his wife, “That I have never seen such a lady before, such a perfect Lady.” But what I did I don’t know. I must have cooked well, of course that I do! (applause) But I must have looked after him well, I must have been kind to him, to all of them. I must have not eaten anything myself, looked after them; must have done something, I don’t remember what I did. But by my own nature I’m telling you. And it is not today but I have seen so many of them come so handy, only because of this nature of mine; only because of this nature of mine.

You know our High Commissioner in UK, both the High Commissioners the first one and the second one, B.K.Nehru, and the second one, they had such tremendous respect for me, regard for me, you can’t imagine.

Because you have to be kind and considerate and nice. As you look after me here, I looked after them. And that’s how! They have such impressions. I tell you all my husband’s friends and everybody have such regard and respect. We went to see somebody who is head of the law, is the head of the Intelligence in India; he gave us a right royal treatment! The Collector of Customs was informed that Mother’s children are coming, he himself came to the airport. Do you know that? He was sitting there I don’t know if he came out to see that you were all out. It is only my personal life with them otherwise who cares for whose wife? So many came after my husband, nobody’s bothered about their wives! Anywhere! I came this time with my husband to go to China and his agents who were in Japan and other places, Honolulu and all, they all came just to meet me, because when he comes nobody comes to see him. He said, “Now, you have come, they have come to see me!” Can you believe it? It’s nothing but just being a lady to them. It’s such a powerful thing. It’s such a powerful thing.

And women must know how to cook, that’s important. If they don’t know how to cook they’re not women, I don’t think they are women. They all must know how to cook. You must learn how to cook and everybody can learn it, that’s very important. Is the hidden power of a woman lies in how she cooks. You see our men cannot go anywhere because we cook so well they have to come back home. They remember the food. (applause) So that is the power you have.

Today we are going to have a very short puja because today is my birthday and so the puja on a birthday should be such that it should be more deep, more heartfelt, more joyous, than it should go on a ritual side. There’s no need to have much rituals because we are in a joyous mood celebrating our Mother’s birthday. Already we are there. Whatever is needed for you to be there is not needed now because you are in that joyous mood, alright?

So, only thing – a very short puja, I have told him – is to be done today; is a birthday. There is no need to have a huge, big puja, all that is needed to bring out all the deities, they are already there, up there. Just see the vibrations they are emitting! They are so very happy that you are celebrating my birthday.

So in every puja what we have to do is to awaken them, ask them to be kind to you, this, that. Though they are awakened in me you want them to be. But now they are all awakened in you we don’t have to have a big puja at all. There’s no need at all. And this is what I have told Modi that you have a very, very short puja. And a very short puja should be alright.

So today’s talk was just like a puja. Remember that this is meant for you when you were not Sahaja Yogis. Today it is not meant for you. So you won’t feel guilty! (laughter)

First remember you are Sahaja Yogis, you are my children and I love you very much, very, very much. So please have confidence in yourself, complete confidence in yourself. Alright? That’s the greatest thing you can give me today as a present.

May God bless you!

So for this you have to have washing of my feet for five minutes and washing of my hands for about ten minutes, that’s all, as simple as that. Now we don’t need many people for that, just put that thing here, that one, just. Alright. Now remove this.