Puja in Hyderabad, India. 11 December 1991.
We have today come to this famous place, Hyderabad, which was ruled by Muslim kings, but they were very Indian and they fought also for the independence of India with the British. You know about Tipu Sultan, who was also a realized soul but he was killed.
We have in our country one very big problem and that is, individually we are all great people, but when it comes to collective we don’t know how to live collectively, and that is why we lost our independence. Anybody can manage us. If we can open our eyes and see, it is quite easily understood that when people try to talk ill of others, involving us, there must be some intention. This has been our failing since long, that people use such methods that they spoil the relationships. And this should not crawl into Sahaja Yoga. When I am in India I think I should put some light on our weaknesses also.
The second weakness we have, that we are very involved with our family; with our children, with our parents, with our brothers, cousins, this, that. Till you are completely deceived or cheated by someone so close, you’ll never learn a lesson. We are very involved; all our problems are around them. We cannot get out of our family. All the time we start thinking that: “Sahaja Yoga should help my family. Sahaja Yoga should do this for my family.” In Sahaja Yoga there’s another family that has nothing to do with your family. I have seen people, Sahaja Yogis who are of a very high level, and suddenly I find they have gone down. They have no reason to suffer in health or in any way. Then I find out that they’re attached to some brother or someone who is doing some other kind of guru business. Instead of we influencing them, they start influencing us. So we have to really break our relationships with all such people who are negative, because we have had relations and relations and relations all our lives. What did we get out of them? If we do not understand how important it is to be a Sahaja Yogi, that you are the instrument of God Almighty. So many things you know that even Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesha did not know. They didn’t know much about Kundalini. They didn’t know how to raise the Kundalini. They didn’t know how to give Realization, except for gurus. Out of them also you know that Janaka had only one disciple. All of them had one each.
So certain things you know are more than anybody had known before. But still if you are sticking on to your old standards and old methods and confusing them with Sahaja Yoga, identifying with them as Sahaja Yoga, then your growth will be very little. So I have to tell you that, try to get out of this. “Who is my brother? Who is my sister?” Of course it’s a good thing to be attached, in a way, to the duties that you have to perform towards everyone, but all the duties should be done in such a manner that you do not get involved into it. It is very important that you should not get involved with those duties. Whatever has to be done you should do, but you shouldn’t worry as to the fruit of it. Talking ill about others, saying things just to spoil the relationship is sin, in Sahaja Yoga. Always talk good things about others. For example, if somebody comes and tells Me that such and such person is not good and all that, I tell them lies. I tell them: “That person was praising you so much. Why are you saying all these things against that person?”
So it is important for Sahaja Yogis to create a more synthesis, more coordination, more combinations and more bringing in more and more people. But people get more attached to the negative people than to the positive people. That means still you are not in Sahaja Yoga fully. Once you start understanding this it would be very, very clear-cut what you should do and what you should not do as far as these relationships are concerned. I mean, in India it’s a common thing for a minister to appoint his nephew, his son, his wife, his grandson, even his servant into some post. It’s a common thing, whether they are capable or not. But in Sahaja Yoga you can’t do. You have to be a Sahaja Yogi. You can’t just get anybody because he’s your relation and ask that: “Mother, see now, he’s my relation. Please help this man.” Why should God help people who are not Sahaja Yogis? He does not know them and He doesn’t want to do it. So our concept about family life has to change. Of course the best thing you can do for your family is to bring them to Sahaja Yoga, but if you are sticking on to people because they’re your family, it’s very dangerous.
Then there is second kind of a movement with this behavior, that you start thinking about your own city: “This is my city.” You could have been born anywhere. So: “My city. Mother, You come to my city. Is important.” It’s like: my home, my relations and my city. Then, my country: “This is my country. Mother, You must come to my country.” I understand. Your concern is good, it’s patriotic, that you are worried about other people in your own country. But there should not be any attachment. One should be detached, and detached in the way, I would say, that just watch. Just watch yourself and others. See for yourself, why are you so much interested in your own country or in your own capital? Why? Why is it? When you ask this question you’ll be surprised, mostly you’ll find: “Because I belong to this place, I was born in this place, that’s why I want.” Mostly; honest answer. But could be that: “I want also that these people should become Sahaja Yogis. It’s easy for me because I am from this place, I would like them to be Sahaja Yogis.” This is one of the basic reasons why Sahaja Yoga does not spread, that we get involved into pockets of our family and we don’t go across them to others. So all our attention, all our behavior is completely entangled into something which is not Sahaj.
So we have to go beyond and know that our family is different. The whole world is our family, so we have to move out. Don’t get stagnated or entangled with a small circle of few people who are negative, but go beyond them, because you’ve got the powers, you’ve got everything. You can easily cross over these barriers and see for yourself that you are feeling now mentally very happy, physically all right, and spiritually you are there. In our Indian society people take to sanyasa. They’ll wear [SOUNDS LIKE “KASHAI”], go out, many people after certain age take to sanyasa. Why not take the sanyasa inside just now? What is the need to wait till you get old and then absolutely haggard and then to say that you are a sanyasi? Even anyway you are a sanyasi at that time, but when you are young you should develop this detachment, a clear-cut detachment: that is, you are attached to Sahaja Yoga and to nothing else. Nothing is more important than Sahaja Yoga to you. Once we decide that, then you move in that line and you grow in that line very mildly, very well. But supposing you get short-circuited and move somewhere else, then how can there be growth? It looks extremely simple to us: we must help our relations, we must help all other ones. To Indians it is very easy, it happens to them very easily. But the Western people are not like that. They will not go about, wasting their energy about their relations normally. They are worried about themselves, and they want that they should achieve the highest themselves.
Now, once we take away our attention from the family, you’ll be surprised how this attention works across the family, across this small little wall that we have built. And you are surprised how it expands, and how it gives you all the blessings and all the grace of Divine love. We always start thinking about our relations, about how to be kind to them, how to be nice to them. Or all these things, all these behaviors of how to be nice to them, how to be good to them and all that, can be extended so much, can expand so much. As you love them, as you care for them, as you are attached to them, if you get attached to Sahaj then the light will spread.
For example now, near Hyderabad there are many small cities, small places, lots of them. You can all take up one city or one small little village or something. Go there and talk about Sahaja Yoga. It will definitely work out. That’s how in England they have worked it out, and in many other countries. So I have to tell all the Sahaja Yogis who are here in Hyderabad and who are also in other places, like Vishakapatnam or Vijayawada or anywhere; all of them should understand that at least they can spread it in their city, Sahaja Yoga, very fast, in case they get detached from their family. I know of certain Sahaja Yogis, their wives are so strong at it that they cannot overcome even their wives, leave alone other relations. We have had an experience of such women. Specially in India there is a rule that whatever is the dharma of the husband, that a wife has to follow. But still I’ve seen that even the wives can be very powerful because they’re so assertive, so aggressive. And if the husband is simple he has to suffer. So here I would say that one should not succumb to anyone because he’s dominating or in any way assertive, but stand back and tell that this is the dharma we are following, and nobody has business to check us. We are on a fundamental right, doing it.
Now the question is about how we deal with each other in Sahaja Yoga, how we live with each other, how we talk to each other. What is the net result? Do we have a complete rapport with other Sahaja Yogis in the same city? Do you invite them to your house as you would invite your neighbors? In any matter whatsoever pertaining to you, any matter whatsoever, the relations have nothing to do with you. That’s how you will start getting detached and not worrying about it.
Now here are the many Western Sahaja Yogis. [SHRI MATAJI SPEAKS IN HINDI]. The description I’ve given now of when people who are left-sided actually, they have attachments of the left side. The right side attachments are different type, as you know very well. The first one is that they are individualistic, they don’t like collectivity. They think it is a force on them; it is a binding thing, so that they cannot rise. Right-sided people have the biggest problem is of ego, which is all the time sitting like a snake, coiled up. Something goes wrong, suddenly it comes up – Ha! and you see a snake come up now. The snake is very springy. But now with Sahaja Yoga it is getting intoxicated, I think; it doesn’t come up. So the attachments: on what points do we get upset? We should write it down. All right. For example, what do I get upset with, Myself? When I see a Sahaja Yogi becoming bhootish I get upset. But you just try to find out: “When do I get upset?” and you’ll be surprised, most of those things are out of Sahaja Yoga; they have nothing to do with Sahaja Yoga. But you are very upset, very angry, and you don’t want to talk about it.
So this attitude of mind has to be changed. When you are set now in Sahaja Yoga, how can you be upset? That means you are not set: simple thing. You are now set in Sahaja Yoga. So how can you be upset? A very common language there is to say: “I hope you are not upset”. When you say somebody is upset, he’s upset, I mean, may be whether you hope or don’t hope! But we do not also consider how do we upset others? We don’t also find out the ways and methods, how not to upset others. And even the humor we have, if it is pinching humor, if it is disturbing humor, if it is denouncing humor, that can upset a person very much. So what sort of language we speak, what sort of communication we have, what sort of harm we do to people: you need not be hot-tempered, your ego may not be seen, but it’s the style, very sly style of the ego, just to say something horrible. Second way is of criticizing others all the time: “This is not good, that is not good, this not good.” Who has asked you to judge it? So you should not judge yourself, at the same time you should not judge others and punish them. In our day to day life we have to develop a very sweet language, extremely sweet. We have to work it out, actually work it out, because even coming to Sahaja Yoga still it lingers, certain things, and these habits can be corrected very simply, very easily. It belongs to the tongue, not to us, so it’s very easy to get rid of them.
The obstinacy is another thing which is a horrible thing. Anybody suffers from this kind of very subtle obstinacy; obstinacy [SOUNDS LIKE “RESTS”], these things are tied down with a rope. Now whatever may happen, you are tied down: “Once I have decided, I have decided.” “But what is the harm in changing?” “No, no, no, no; we don’t want any change.” Now in Sahaja Yoga I’m happy, nothing is decided, nothing is fixed. We were to have Puja, say, yesterday; we’ll have it today, that too in the morning. It should not upset you because it’s all done to keep your upsetting you away. So when is the program and when is not the program is not important. What is important is that how you have managed with that change. If you do not know how to manage the change, then your transformation is incomplete.
Now this English language I have learnt in this lifetime, and I find there are some good points about it, that you must say ten times: “Thank you” even if somebody gives you water, or fifteen times: “Sorry!” morning till evening. In a way it is good, but if it’s just a lip-service, then everybody knows that you have to say “Thank you”, so they said “Thank you” so well. But at the same time, if you remember how graciously he did that for you, just remember that. Next time you meet that person, all this graciousness will come out, because you get a feeling: somebody does something for you, you get a beautiful feeling of gratitude. And once you get that feeling, if you remember that feeling, then you’ll go on adding up to it. [SHRI MATAJI SAYS, ASIDE: “I THINK YOU ALSO SIT IN THE SUN, IS TOO MUCH HOT”]. It goes on adding. The more you add these beautiful feelings within yourself: “How I felt when they did it”. Every time you get some sort of a experience of that kind, if you keep it within yourself, any time you open that area of your memory, all the beauty will start pouring on you, of that feeling.
So we have to learn new methods of making ourselves happy. Before that we used to be happy when we hurt others, we used to be happy when we were sarcastic with others. But now we have to develop a new method of making ourselves happy; and once your mind goes on to that: “I have to be happy, joyous. What am I doing? Why am I doing like this? How can I be happy? By saying a harsh thing to others or by saying something mischievous, how can I be happy? I cannot be.” Then, “This Mr. Ego, he makes me extremely unhappy. He’s really spoilt my mood.” And you tell him to get out now, get down, get down. Then it will go down.
At this juncture when you are so advanced in Sahaja Yoga, I should not have told all these things to you; I agree with you entirely, that now the time is not for telling you all these things regarding your behavior toward other Sahaja Yogis. But even a slightest movement completely changes the atmosphere. So one has to be extremely careful and attentive, has to know what you say, what you have to say, how you behave, and how you create a feeling. In the society of Sahaja Yoga we have beautiful people, we laugh, we enjoy, we do all kinds of things, and really we are in the most joyous company all the time. After all it’s joy, and what we achieve in joy is the highest. At the same time we have to remember that the collective subconscious is there, and that may just jump sometime and come back. Sahaja Yoga doesn’t believe in any revenge, hatred; nothing of the kind. It doesn’t believe in any kind of a false pride, or any kind of restrictions or anything. It believes in the pure sense of humanity and also the great work of Sahaja Yoga.
It gives you great pleasure to be kind, to be nice; so subside, to subside these habits you have to do some abyas, you have to practise, and introspect yourself. I am not saying because anybody has reported anything that is like that, nothing, in no way. But at this juncture I am just telling you, because now when you will be going out you’ll be meeting new people, then you might have problems, might have problems of facing people whom you would be harsh, you would be more meticulous, you may be much more aggressive than normal. All these things will upset, upset them; but if you are peaceful, tolerant, forgiving, that will definitely make them feel that you are saints. If they are difficult leave them alone, don’t argue, by argument you cannot give them Realization. If they don’t have wisdom they don’t deserve it, they don’t, they are not destined to be like that. But your style has to be such that they should know that you are saints. In all your self-respect, in all your love you have to talk to them.
So now when you are here in this country you have to decide how you are going to spread Sahaja Yoga when you go back. Same with our Indian Sahaja Yogis: they have to also find out ways and methods, how they will spread Sahaja Yoga.
May God bless you.
[Hindi Talk after the Puja]