I was at Pratishthan. In August 2003, my daughter had gone to the USA for higher studies and probably, in my heart, there was a concern about that, and suddenly, Shri Mataji mentioned that She had been to the beautiful city of Shiraz in Iran. Again, without thinking, I said that my daughter’s name was Shiraz and that recently she had gone to the USA. Also, that at first she resented my coming to Sahaja but was now happy about it. Just a few days before this, my daughter had told me on the phone that she had written to Shri Mataji about this and had given the letter to a Sahaja Yogi friend to give it to Her at the puja. Shri Mataji told me that She remembered reading the letter and that it was my daughter’s innocence which had made her write it. However, in fact the letter never went as the Sahaja Yogi could not make it to the puja.
I asked Shri Mataji when Zarathustra had incarnated in Persia, as the dates varied, putting it anywhere between 3000 and 8000 BC. She told me that Zarathustra incarnated three or four times in Persia.
Shri Mataji likes everything (written 2005)
The second time I met Shri Mataji was at Kalpana Didi’s house in the early 2000’s, and I was called there as assistant cook. For three days I did not go in front of Shri Mataji. I was very afraid, and did not know how to go in front of Her. At last, the other servants forced me to go in front of Shri Mataji with the tray of food. She was sitting on the chair, and looked at me, because I had the tray in my hand and could not do pranams to Her. So I lent my head forward a bit.
‘Jai Shri Mataji’, I said, and She smiled at me. Then I put the tray in front of Her and went back to the kitchen.
The next day, at about one o’clock in the night, Shri Mataji was watching the TV. We were about to go to sleep. Shri Mataji’s attendant came there and said that She wanted a Diet Coke. So I served it in a glass, and took it to Her. When I went to Her room the TV was on very loud and She looked at me.
‘Keep it, keep it,’ She said. ‘You are not yet sleeping. All right, you go and sleep now.’ Then I went back to the kitchen.
So every time I had the opportunity to cook and go in front of Shri Mataji with chapattis and so on, and was able to serve tea to Her, I felt so much joy. Shri Mataji likes everything, but in the morning She likes chilna, which is made of moong dal. She also likes Diet Coke and bindi (ladies’ fingers) and eats non-veg food, like mutton and chicken. She also likes shemi (mutton) kebab. She likes everything!
Shri Mataji always takes Her food late at night. One day the cook had gone out with Sir CP. I was alone cooking in the kitchen and one of the vegetables was ready, and I was cooking another one and suddenly She asked for the food. She said She was hungry and wanted to be served the food. So Shri Mataji’s younger daughter Sadhana Didi came into the kitchen and said that She wanted the food then. The food was not completely ready, but I could not refuse. I was in the middle of cooking a dish with chickpea flour, called pitla. Shri Mataji had asked for food three or four times and time was passing.
‘Quickly, serve the food!’ She said. The pitla was not completely cooked but I had to serve the half cooked pitla to Her.
‘Where is Sahib?’ (meaning Sir CP) She asked, just as She was going to sit at the table and eat.
‘Perhaps they have gone out shopping,’ said a Sahaja Yogi.
‘Then why are we eating the food now, so early? We will eat together, with Sahib,’ Shri Mataji replied. It was like a miracle that She knew the food was not properly cooked, so She said She would eat later with Sahib. It was a test for me as to what I would do. I was happy, because after that I was able to cook the pitla nicely and after one and a half hours Shri Mataji again called for the food.
‘Today the food was nice – tasty food!’ She said.
‘Anant ashyavaad’ (endless blessings)
I was with Shri Mataji for about nine to ten days. On the 24th or 25th April, Shri Mataji was going to Cabella at about 11.30 in the night. She was sitting in the hall and we were all doing pranams to Her. There were some trustees around Her and all the staff were there around me. Shri Mataji called all of us.
‘Anant ashiyavad,’ (endless blessings) She said to all of us. I was also standing there.
‘Give a thousand rupees each to all the staff,’ Shri Mataji said to Sir CP. After that, I went down with the flowers which had been given to Her to put them in the car. Again I was going back to the flat, but Shri Mataji was coming down in Her wheelchair in the same lift as I was trying to go up in. Suddenly She was there in front of me. There were a few steps, and someone had put some planks so Shri Mataji’s wheelchair could come down. Her son-in-law and some Sahaja Yogis were there, and there were four of us and we were trying to get the wheelchair down slowly. I was behind the wheelchair, supporting the chair and Shri Mataji’s face was the other way from me – I was behind Her. When we got the wheelchair down, Shri Mataji turned around and smiled.
‘Are you there?’ She said. There were two more steps to go down and Shri Mataji called me to the front and I had to put my hand just where Her Foot was, and then at that moment, She lifted Her sari a little bit so I could see Her Foot. Then She got in the car.
‘Anant ashiyavad,’ She said again to all of us. She was very happy and we were all very happy too.
My Spirit immediately recognised Her
I went to my first puja in Cabella some five or six years ago, in the early 2000’s. I had received my self realisation in Ireland and was very curious about Shri Mataji, especially as I had been told She is the Holy Spirit. The leader said the next step would be to go to a puja in Cabella, so I went.
On the first evening a lot of arranging was being done, for the puja. I was so excited at having the chance to see Shri Mataji, and had strong feelings that She was on Her way. I told one of the Yoginis, who explained that Mother never came on the first two days, but would come on the third day, the Sunday.
‘Mother is coming tonight – I am sure of it!’ I repeated. The Yogini explained that She was ill and the chance of Her coming was remote.
‘Please take your positions everyone, Mother is on the way,’ was suddenly announced.
I will never forget when Shri Mataji walked in. Tears flowed and my heart was filled with such joy. I sat very close to the stage and was able to put my full attention on Mother. I was truly blessed under the circumstances, in particular because of Shri Mataji’s poor health at that time. She had come into my heart and my Spirit had immediately recognised Her.
Sahasrara Puja 2004, at Cabella
In the early 2000’s, at Cabella, when the ladies from the organising countries were invited to perform puja, I was so eager to do it that I arrived first at the foot of the stage and then felt a bit awkward for having rushed thus, and was consequently standing there by myself. Shri Mataji looked at me with a very loving glance and encouraged me to come closer. She seemed to know me and know of everything I was going thorough at the moment. Although circumstances in my life at that time were concurring to help me become more humble, sometimes to the expense of my self-confidence, meeting Shri Mataji that year in Cabella helped restore my confidence and hope.
Almost miraculously, my son, who was then two and half and would not normally sleep unless there was perfect silence around, had fallen asleep, so I could entrust him to the Italian ladies sitting nearby, while performing the puja. Everything seemed looked after and organized by the Divine.
They are from Bolivia
I’ll never forget the balmy summer’s day in Barcelona when the phone rang. The NGO worker on the other end spoke of three siblings who had been living in an orphanage in Bolivia since the youngest was a few months old. The lady asked if my husband Enzo and I would consider being their parents? Almost nine months after that, we were able to hold our Cochabambinos to our hearts – and of course they took to Sahaj life like ducks to water.
It was 2004, not long after Shri Mataji had ‘withdrawn’ and She was not speaking at all. We were at the airport waiting with our flowers till we saw Shri Mataji’s entourage emerge with the Goddess sitting regally in Her chair.
The children, who had been standing calmly with me and Enzo, suddenly disappeared – they’d managed to slip underneath the barrier and were now running towards Her as if their lives depended on it. They sweetly gave Mother their flowers and even planted a number of kisses on Her tender cheeks. I saw a glimmer of a smile on Her lips.
‘Shri Mataji, these are Danya and Enzo’s children from Columbia!’ a lady announced. I bit my tongue – whilst bowing down I thought: ‘You know everything Mother, they are Your children – You know they are from Bolivia!’
Shri Mataji and Her family were whisked off in the car, leaving us all shinier and more peaceful, wrapped up in Her sparkling loving chaitanya.
Months later, during a chance conversation with Mother’s driver, he mentioned that there had been some discussion of the children in Shri Mataji’s car that day. Sadhana Didi had commented on their sweetness, also saying something about them coming from Columbia. Shri Mataji until then had not uttered a word.
‘They are from Bolivia, not Columbia,’ She said simply.
Christmas Puja in Pune, 2004
Christmas Puja time was set on the 25th of December for 7.00 pm.
‘Come with me, take your belongings and come with me. Where are you from? Just follow me,’ a young Indian man said to me. Slowly I followed him, wondering where he would take me. As he was walking towards the stage and he asked me to wait there, I slowly started to wonder. More ladies had arrived, mostly Indian Sahaja Yoginis, and by the time we were seven, we were asked to sit on the edge of the red carpet, leading from the side to the stage, where Shri Mataji’s chair was. I started to realize why we were here, and at that moment of realization a rush of vibrations came over me, through my hands, body, my whole being and I felt myself totally in the real presence of silence and love of our Most Holy Mother, Shri Mataji.
We did not know at all and did not dare to expect that Our Holy Mother would grace us with Her physical presence that evening. Around 7.00 pm, the conch indeed announced Her arrival. At the sight of Our Mother, quite a few of us were struggling to hold back tears, tears of emotion, of being overwhelmed. But some deeper strength came up very quickly from within, pushing those tears away.
We were asked to go on stage. With a gentle and silent namaskar we greeted Shri Mataji. Sadhana Didi, with an expression of total sweetness and great dignity, unfolded a beautiful sari and gave it to all us to hold in a half circle around Mother. Shri Mataji was sitting on Her beautifully decorated chair, absolutely silent, still without any movement, Her skin glowing, soft as silk and almost transparent. Her eyes were for a long time looking at each of us, a look of the strongest kind I have ever felt or experienced before. She was penetrating completely, penetrating into our beings, touching the deepest centre point within myself. Eventually there were also slightly ‘other things’ besides that centre point becoming apparent, and I wished that they would not have been there, especially at that moment. But there was nothing I could do about it.
Mother’s strong, almost laser sharp and stern look did not move, and looking up to Her, I felt the strongest plea in Her eyes and whole expression of Her face, that ‘She needs us. She needs us to be there in the centre.’ It was a plea of such overwhelming strength, accompanied by a feeling of urgency: ‘I do need you, I need you to be at this centre point, without any compromise or failure.’
Christmas Puja in Pune, 2004
Her penetrating look did not stop, but my eyes had to bow down to Her Holy Lotus Feet, where the swastika was painted on at that moment, and with all my desire from that ‘centre point’ I joined into the song Mahishasura Mardini. In that way I humbly joined the collective request to the Goddess to please destroy the negativity, which endlessly disturbs and troubles the purity, balance and harmony.
Although I have been part of and witnessed many celebrations of pujas over the years, I could not recount at all any detail of the procedure of this puja. All I remember in my most inner core of being and heart is Mother’s overwhelming plea: ‘I need you. I need you all. I need you to be at this centre point.’ This impression is strong enough to stay with me for the rest of my life. Also it seemed compulsory to share this experience with all children and devotees of Shri Mataji, as I was just only one drop out of the whole, out of all of us, being asked to be on stage.
Shri Mataji did, and does, hear our prayers
It was 2004, the Christmas Puja at the sports stadium outside Pune. I was sitting at a café having a cup of tea before the puja, and saw Mr Saundankar, the great Sahaja Yogi from Nasik, who composed the words and music of Namostute and Teri hi Gune Gate hai – and some other wonderful bhajans. I called him over and we had more tea. Then I noticed Djamel Metouri, another old Sahaja Yogi. He joined our little party and I introduced him to Mr Saundankar, explaining that it was he who had given the Sahaja world these beautiful bhajans which praised Mother so profoundly. Djamel agreed that they were a great gift to us, and Mr Saundankar mentioned that although when they were first created they were often sung at pujas, for the last ten years, in India, neither of them had once been sung at any of the pujas in Mother’s physical presence.
Some time later the puja started and I was sitting at the front, from where I could see what was going on. After the Shri Ganesha Puja part, it moved on to the Devi Puja section, and I noticed Shri Mataji gave a message to someone to tell the musicians something. They immediately stopped the introduction to whatever bhajan they were about to play and lo and behold! for the first time in many years, instead of Jago Savere aya hai, for the hundred and eight names of the Goddess, they played, and many thousands sang, Teri hi Gune Gathe hai. Then they went back to their obviously prearranged programme, but again Mother gave an instruction, and within moments we were all singing Namostute. I saw Mr Saundankar later and he was overwhelmed and overjoyed.
A few months later I saw the Saundankars as they were registering for the Birthday Puja in Delhi, and laughingly asked if these bhajans might again be requested – but we doubted it because the Delhi (Noida) group had some excellent ones including the delightful and stirring Jago Savere. However, much to our surprise, and also that of the musicians and everyone else, the same thing happened as had at Pune. There were at least fifteen thousand people at these pujas and on each occasion the Saundankar family were sitting way back, where Mother could not have seen them, in normal terms.